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#1
Jun 25, 2005, 02:00 AM
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been over six months now. and the scars are still so dark. even darker now cause of summer. (yeah, how sick, the thought of former cutter in bikini tanning..ick, i look horrible) and its almost like ive been a separate person for 6 months and im just now coming back into reality. i mean, ive been down, just havent hurt myself. but now..the need..the NEED is soo bad. its like i can feel it in my arms and legs just where my body wants it. can almost feel the skin tearing, the blood dripping. all so different than the feeling of the past six months. oh..but how my arms and legs ache so bad with need..
__________________
 Your memory is a monster; you forget - it doesn't. It simply files things away. It keeps things for you, or hides things from you - and summons them to your recall with a will of its own. You think you have a memory; but it has you. -John Irving |
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#2
Jun 25, 2005, 06:14 PM
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(((((((((StormWarning)))))))))
Hang in there. You are doing wonderful work by resisting and exploring the reasons for your pain inside. Keep talking to us if we can help. |
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#3
Jun 26, 2005, 10:48 PM
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meh..its nothing. just a lot of little things all together to make me feel bad. i figured id be miserable over summer vacation, was worse than this last year. the way i see it is im out of school, theres nothing to occupy my thoughts anymore, nothing i want to do, nothing im capable of doing. so now without the stress and work of school, im stuck in myself. ill really be at a loss next year when im done with school, ( my senior year of highschool this fall), and i have no clue what im doing anymore. ugh...nvm
__________________
Your memory is a monster; you forget - it doesn't. It simply files things away. It keeps things for you, or hides things from you - and summons them to your recall with a will of its own. You think you have a memory; but it has you. -John Irving |
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#4
Jun 27, 2005, 09:28 AM
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{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Storm}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
 
__________________
"My Therapist always says there is HOPE, so he continues to be my light of HOPE even on my darkest of days" |
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