Why now?

I was having a really bad day the monday before last and I found myself sitting in group wanting to SI. It's stupid because I havn't done that in about 6months. I havn't even wanted to do it for a while now. I had talked about an abuse situation earlier with my t so that may have been what triggered it but it really freaks me out that I could so easily fall back into bad habits. Group was still going on for another 30min after so by the time I had gotten out I was over it enough to restrain. I've talked about the abuse with other people since then and havn't wanted to do that so why was then any different?

It was most likely just the stress of the moment. It can happen, and then after you opened up to others then you were able to deal with the stress after speaking about it. But I know for me when I bring up or tell someone, it can lead to SI thinking but you can change your thinking. Just like you did in Group. Great job on making it through!!

Were you triggered in group?

They were talking about relationships and I guess it I started thinking about the failed relationships I've had with family and also the failed romantic relationships I've had cause I'm scared of going forward.

I have been triggered in a group of people many times before. It is so much different than being triggered when you are by yourself. You feel like you are on display or something and it makes it more difficult to deal with. It sounds like you handled it well, though. I think that it would be really helpful for you to mention that you are triggered in group while it is happening.