admitting your scars to someone

it's been 10 years for me since a sudden and violent rage left me with a few noticeable scars that have been held tight and secret from nearly everyone and i'm beginning to feel the only way to be free from them is to begin admitting them.

who of us, who has kept the origin of their scars a close secret, has confided in others of the nature of their scars or the reason that they happened? what type of responses have you received?

i tend to keep mine hidden. Basically most people judge you over them. I think you have to have ''been there'' to understand.
But im sure there are enlightened and understanding people out there. Most people will just ignore them and not ask, they dont want the confrontation or they dont wanna know i guess, but im sure they speculate.
Best of luck to you.

I personally got found out by a friend unintentionally. Which actually was good, since it started me into therapy. Sometimes I do tell people about my past self-injury stuff, but I'm pretty fortunate that my scars are pretty not noticeable since I never was much for cutting - other SI was a bigger thing for me.

I never used to let my SI scars show, but just last week I managed to put myself in my swimsuit and not cover my arms when I went swimming with basically the only friend I have (we've been friends for less than a year). I just couldn't hide it anymore

I kept my scars a secret for years, never wearing shorts or swimsuits. I dreaded people seeing them, it used to get me so anxious. I got more comfortable with them over time. They show where I’ve been and who I am as a person, and right now all I can do is be myself. My scars empower me to stop. They show me that yeah I’ve been down but I’m picking myself up slowly.

The responses I have gotten aren’t all good, I’ll tell you that, but I have good friends who have my back, that know my story. They are the ones that are true. I use my story to empower, and to show people that it’s okay to feel, it’s okay to hurt, but SI isn’t a good way to cope. Yeah I SI still, but I am working toward a better day, and a better life. That’s all we can do right?

My best advice is to admit it as you are comfortable. If you aren’t okay with sharing a story with a friend or someone, don’t. You can opt out of it, it’s all about if you are willing to admit that you did SI at some point in your life. If you feel that you are ready go for it.

yeah sorry i was too negative the other day. Just because im still gaining confidence didnt mean i had to dump on yours.
You will feel better if you have nothing to hide

I prefer to keep mine secret - my T knows I SI, but doesn't know where / how etc... I can't imagine revealing them to anyone.

I have only ever admitted to one person and I haven't ever let him see most of them. I avoid short and swimming suits like the plague as most of my noticable scars are on my thighs. He got me to swim in a lake today (in knee length shorts). That was the first time I've been in the water for two years. I used to love swimming, but now I pretend I don't so I don't have to get in the water.

i'm not really planning to shout it from mountaintops. more that i wanted to be able to share with a few people who are close to me. my wife is the only one i've ever told the story to. i'm not sure when i will tell anyone else and i'm not in a hurry. but it's been on my mind much more lately. i'm not surprised that there are some judgers but the people i would consider telling i feel would accept me and if not then oh well i guess.

It’s good to be open about it even if it is only with a select few. You don’t need to hurry, it’s a process, when you become more able to go for it. If they don’t accept you are they really worth it to have around?

Remember you only need to tell as much as you are comfortable.