F i might slip after going so dar

I havnt sh in 2 months. I got a job, my license and i was getting a car tomorrow but i got fired and im not getting a car. I have to cancel my europe trip and people expect me to go get a new job. what do i tell an employer. i had it for 3 weeks. it was my very first job. n i still have to tell my dad, n i have to go and face everyone to go get my paycheck. i just want to cut. punish myself, feel numb ANYTHING. peopekl are just expectign em to get over it and go for a new job.... why cant they understand

i appreciate the love and support that help drive me back intomy giant hell hole

Sorry to hear that you have lost your job and that seems to be having a knock on effect leading you to want to SH. Do you want to share more about why you lost your job? Do you have a T?

Also I wonder what things you have been doing over the last 2 months to stop the SH (well done BTW)

Keep safe - SD

just good things like job, school ending, license n other stuff. apparently im an iresponsvble worker because i came when i didnt have work to buy chips and the alarm went off and me n my friend ran out of the store so apparently i stole something. but the alarm goes off sometimes so i stopped and looked back and thought it was just the chips so i kept going..... i didnt run and his story is copmpletely wrong. he hass times and people mixed up, like sunday and monday i went the alam went off monday and he said it happened sunday and that jamie called after me when the night the alarm went off amanda was working till and noooo one called after me and i was in the parking lot for a good 5 min before i left so someone could have come after me so thats bs....and its completely stupid but i hate myself so much for ****ing up but like really? why would i steal from somewhere i have a discount and work for **** sakes..... im completely devastated and i cut after so long and it felt so good and now im ashamed and mad at myself because i know im gonna start cutting regularly just so the dpression doesnt catch up but it will and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhggggggggggggg.... i cant fight him cause he could involve the cops and charge me for stealing something even though i didnt.... god i wanna cry.

i got fired because i ran out of the store when the alarm went off..... thats his exuse... that im irresponsible. hes like would u run out of shoppers if the alarm went off. i wanted to say, of course not, i would do what i did except more thorough becasuse i wouldnt have known about the door alarm........ i would have looked for securtiy to get myself off the hook and that it was a mistake... i didnt even have my purse on me that night so it had to have been the chips...., omfg i dont even know....

i hope i didnt get fired becaue of a shoplifting friend.....

Sorry this is such a difficult time for you - do you have a T?

No i have a psych but just saw her so 2 more months until i see her next AND MOTHER **** i just remeberd i had an appt with a social, worker on mondayt and i forgot holy ****.... why a i such a **** up......

Could you call your social worker today and explain that you forgot as you have a lot going on right now and ask for another appointment?

So sorry brennan about you're loss of job and car.
Set backs happen, you have proven you can get a job and a car, to tell you're closest and hold you're head up high in a disaster shows more strenth than getting a car and a job.
Hold on and you will have another job and a car and a trip to europe.
You have nothing to punish you're self for, you/we all have set backs; hold on to the piece inside that loves and has hope. The world has a way of turning round and gifting us in strange ways by giving back what was just taken away.

Its hard to listen to others in the storm thats in our minds (I tend to think 'how do they know'), I'm the one in pain.

You're the most important in you're life at the moment, hold on. There is always something round the corner that lifts us back to who we truly are.
Loved human beings.

but this is the second timein a row ive forgotten my appt.... i cant do anything right

How does this stuff happen to a 16 year old who hates to lie, refuses to steal, doesn't like drugs or alcohol very often (meaning i do it every 1-5 months apart), and has depression, anxiety and is addicted to cutting for a punishment...... why is this happening to me..... its like life wants me to give up and kill myself already