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#1
May 22, 2012, 08:37 PM
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I've been cutting for about a year now. -.-' It's the only thing that's kept me from committing suicide, I believe. But now, it's getting worse and yet I still have no will to stop or to get help .-. It's not worse in how many times I do it though because I used to do it many times a day in smaller cuts that would only bleed a few drops. The ones now are spread out over a couple of days and are VERY deep. A little more deep and it will cut into muscle. The little techniques on the internet don't work for me cause I hate myself and it has to hurt to be relieving at all ( I haven't actually tried them but I know it wouldnt work anyway). I don't really know what to do now. I have an urge to cut right now as I type this but I am too numb to really go get my blade out of its comfy little hiding spot -.- T_T
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In the end, is reality Really reality? Or have we been wrong all along... |
 aurill50
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#2
May 22, 2012, 09:24 PM
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I know how you feel. I am also a cutter. What's bothering you hun?
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Look on the brighter side. |
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#3
May 22, 2012, 09:34 PM
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Quote:
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In the end, is reality Really reality? Or have we been wrong all along... |
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#4
May 22, 2012, 09:39 PM
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Yes sometimes cutting is the only thing that can make a person "feel" but it's only a short term fix..
Do you have a therapist? if not you really need to get some help
__________________
“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi |
 Sannah
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#5
May 23, 2012, 08:49 AM
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Being suicidal was the main thing that kept me cutting for so long. You really should seek professional help. Meds may help lessen the urges and make therapy bearable. Have you tried squeezing ice instead of cutting. That helped me most for a pain substance. The first three times I tried to quit cutting ended in suicide attempts. And the longest I made it before my current stretch (7 years) was 11 days. There is hope. Don't give up. I'm not suggesting this, but I spent most of the first month that I didn't cut puking most nights till I didn't have the energy to attempt suicide. And in college when things got really stressful again, I'd occasionally put myself on 24 hour watch (basically dorm mates switched off with each other to make sure someone was ALWAYS with me, including in the bathroom. It was hard, and embarasing, but definitely worth it (and much better and healthier than the puking). Are there certain places where you know you won't cut? The hardest thing for me is finding places where I feel safe from myself and can relax and just breathe for a fe minutes before facing the world again.
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. |
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