i havent cut in a while. I am wanting to badly, but Im also going to visit friends soon. Sometimes i feel so disconnected from my T. I feel like everyone is ignoring every try that I have to reach out. I want to cut or even fake cutting so my T will notice.. I dont want anyone else to find out though. How pathetic.

[__zh]

there is nothing horrible about you EV. feeling disconnected happens to many folks so that isn't unusual. it is very normal to feel ignored when reaching out...especially if one's needs are not being met.

we're very sorry that you sound stressed right now and that you feel "pathetic" for needing attention.

at least you're writing here to express yourself instead of cutting. at least you're writing down the thoughts that are going through your mind instead of cutting.

how about attempting to bring up desiring attention from T with T? when reading this: <font color="blue">with cutting or fake cutting so T will notice</font> it could be seen as asking for attention..............asking for attention is not something to feel pathetic about! please try to talk with T about this instead of cutting if possible.

learning healthier ways of giving ourselves the attention we need as humans or finding safe ppl to get that attention from is part of healing.

you're not pathetic. you're an ongoing survivor who deals with many struggles and tries her best as she is able.

kindly and sincerely,

tks zh..

there has been this unbearable panicky crazy anxiety.. there is.. my head gets so full. anyways.. i went on to cut to see if it helped.. it did mildly... I may have to go back on meds .. anyways.. ZH i hope things are going better for you!!! You are in my thoughts

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((( EV ))))))))

[heartspace]

You're not pathetic EV. Nobody likes feeling ignored. I'd consider telling what you've told us to your therapist. He/she will understand and hopefully realize that you need some attention at the moment. Take care.

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((((((EV)))))))))))))))))))

Bearhugs,
Fuzzy