[MynameisPete]

I know we all have our different reasons for SI. What I would like to know is why do you SI? How does it make you feel? and How long does this feeling last?

For me, I burn. I SI because it distracts me, gets my mind off of how messed up I really am and focus on taking care of it for the time. It hurts bad, but I somehow put up with it and keep going back. I guess I like the pain. The initial feeling only lasts a few minutes, but the fact that I have to take care of it makes it last longer. I find myself constantly feeling it, making sure it is okay and making sure it doesn't get infected.

[smmath]

I SI because:

it gives me a boost of energy as long as it isn't a scar
it positivly modifies my behavior afterwards
it makes me more likely to do work
it momentaraly fixes things
it gives me something to focus on besides emotional turmoil
and it is a way for me to be in control

I also can relate to the feelings that taking care of the wounds can elicit

The "postive" effects last as long as I feel pain or when I rub the cut and the pain returns, the pleasant effects return.

Sorry no advice...yet, but Mynameispete I am glad that you are here and I wish you luck in getting help and support

[SheHulk07]

I do it because it makes me feel like I have control over something when I feel I'm losing control with everything else. The relief only lasts while I'm doing it, and then once it's done I feel guilty about what I've done. It's a vicious cycle.

[adam_k]

The answer to the question varies depending on what is going on. Most of the time it is because I want to feel less depressed, angry or other emotions I don't know how to cope with. In the place the those things I feel numb and not there. Eventually everything comes back and I am back to square one again.

Other times it is because I hate myself and it is the only way I can express it and process those feelings. Afterwards the feelings of self hate and worthlessness subside some and I am left feeling numb and in a state of shock I guess.

Other times I just want it to for no logical reason other than I just feel like I deserve it.

[Catsarecool]

I usually do it because I'm angry at myself in done way or if everything feels really fuzzy, dreamlike and distant because it makes me feel something and bring me back to reality. Occasionally I have no idea why I'm doing it?!

I cut myself. I do it because it feels good, and I want to feel something other than the depression. It's just temporary, it doesn't fix anything obviously.

[mazing]

I did as a way of controlling situations around me when I had no control. It was a way to let out some of the emotions I was feeling.

For a while it was also a way to actually feel - I was so numb most of the time and dissociating regularly. It helped me keep going and 'grounded' to life.

[CaptainKirk]

I feel so numb sometimes I just need the pain to remind me I'm still alive... Other times I just get so mad at myself I love to see myself in pain... For a while it was the only way I could keep that fake smile on and stay "sane" for most of the day... I started in February when my best friend killed herself, and I never really stopped... I wish I could, because I know how much it hurts my boyfriend... But I can't stop...