[Lucinda]

I harmed today quite badly hit a vein etc all sorted now though

I was worried that i had been doing quite well atm and feel generally happier which to me didnt relly make sense as to why i harmed so badly

I rung he local self harm team and she was saying that maybe because i havent been doing it as much and because i have been cutting for nearly 6 years that what i need to do has got worse to kind of achive the same results

I felt and feel really bad because it feels like a set back that i am sabotarging what i am doing well by harming myself

I feel really mixed up as i know in my heart that i am feeling better but it is all so scary and part of me wants to hold on to what i knew, that i am not a strong enough person to make these changes

I feel a bit lost and at odds with myself, moving forwards is so painful

A lost scared hurt and lonely
Lucy

[silver_queen]

Yes, it's my experience too that SI increases in severity. I also think that once you've got used to using SI, the urge is still there, even if you are feeling emotionally better, because it's been kind of programmed into your brain now that if you feel a certain way - you SI and you feel the relief from it. I think it takes a while to react differently, and then you'd need something to have do instead of SI (but which hopefully would be less damaging).

[eternalalien]

((((((((Lucinda))))))))

Don't beat yourself up for feeling the need to cut. Sometimes we fall back on old ways of coping - we can find it comforting, and familiar - espaecially when we're scared. It's ok.

You said that you're doing a lot better than before - that you're happier. Hang on to that thought. Everyone has setbacks, and thats ok too. Don't give up.

Try to do something nice for yourself

[Direction]

Well said eternalalien...

The encourage is good for all of us

[Fuzzybear]

[Lucinda]

thankyou, still not feeling to great today but your words of encouragement have helped

Lucy