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#1
Feb 04, 2007, 01:24 AM
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Theres a little girl in the corner. She is very very evil. She is the spawn of Satan. The little girl is afraid of Satan, she hates Satan but she knows she cant hide from him. She stares at me at night. That little girl in the corner. She stares at me and im afraid to look at her. im afraid to go around corners for fear she will jump out at me. I am afraid to look in mirrors to see that she will stare right back at me. This little girl, this little girl wont leave me alone. I can hear her whisper to me and feel her presence.
Even when Im ok im not. Does that make any sense? It makes me cringe. When I feel ok, im not. My moods are even more pronounced, even more dramatic. When i hate something i want to kill it. When i am upset and annoyed I could go insane. When i feel this things is it normal to feel tingling senations in your private parts? Sorry to be so ...weird. But its like i just want to rip them off. I want to rip my hair off and scream and scream and scream like i never screamed before. When somebody annoys me i want to bash their heads in cement. I have dreams about this...the same dream different people if i get angry i get raging and imagine me smashing their heads in cement. Dear God..please help me. I would never hurt a soul except mysel. Its just when im not SIing at the time that this happens because when i SI im focused on that. Dear God just let me get through this...let me get through this..let me get through this ....
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#2
Feb 04, 2007, 01:29 AM
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((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))
You aren't a bad person. You would never hurt another person, and you don't deserve the punishment that you dish out to yourself.
__________________
“We should always pray for help, but we should always listen for inspiration and impression to proceed in ways different from those we may have thought of.” – John H. Groberg 
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#3
Feb 04, 2007, 01:33 AM
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thank you for your support...it means alot to me
__________________
"You look at me, and you dont like what you see. But this is the price of living with you, Mother. " - White Oleander |
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#4
Feb 04, 2007, 12:30 PM
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(((((((((InACorner)))))))))))))))) You are not a bad person. Sometimes it is helpful to find someone professional to help work through strong emotions. It is so hard to find a way to cope with them when they have been self directed for so long. Please take care and be safe.
__________________
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#5
Feb 04, 2007, 12:34 PM
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((((((((((((((( InACorner )))))))))))))))))
Sending you lots of support, Take care hon, Fuzzy
__________________
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#6
Feb 06, 2007, 11:43 PM
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thinking of you
__________________
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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