Inevitable?

Really hard week. My ex has taken my children away for 11 days and gave me 3 days notice. l was so anxious on Thursday and tried to get an extra session with my T, but we couldn't find a time we could both make.

l respect the fact that he tried and l reassured him that l would be Ok without an extra session. But it is so hard right now, I want to Sl, it is all l have thought about all day. l can't settle to anything and am so sad and tearful. l have tried distractions, walking, meditation, even food and smoking ( l gave up 15 years ago) but it is the SI l am craving. l know if l do it l will feel better, but it is the shame of T then asking me about it at our next session, that is stopping me. l just want it to stop.

SoupDragon, I know you are hurting, but please keep from hurting yourself. Yes, remember that your T will be asking. How about sitting down and writing out your feelings and thoughts? Then look at the sticky here about other things you can do other than S-I. Okay?

Don't do it... I know I am not one to say, but I was three months strong and now I feel stupid and ashamed. I know what you crave, I wish I can tell you there was an easier or more reachable way... But you have to fight it... Be stronger than the urge. I know the 'joke' of distractions, people don't get it.... But don't give in. You can do it. Push through. The good day is coming, just hold out till then... Keep posting if you need too.

(((((((( Soup ))))))))