[amalya]

Hello everyone, first time here...

I've been talking with my T lately about self injury (took me almost a year to get there…). Since then she asked a few times how, when, what I feel before, during and after, but I've never been able to answer clearly and openly. It's so hard…

Now I really want to get forward in therapy and feel that I have to share more. but don't sure how much should I share?

How much do you tell your T? do you tell him/her where and how you SH? What do you do afterward? do you let them see wounds/scars?

Although I know she's very experienced and probably heard worst things than that, I'm afraid she will be freaked out and I will feel so bad…

Thanks!

[SheHulk07]

I disclose the answers as honestly as I can based on what they ask. Usually it's where, how many times, did I try anything before hand, did it work, etc. I had a session today where she asked how the SH has been, I said not good. She asked where I did it, why I keep going back to the same spot to cut, did it need stitches, etc. I try to be honest as possible with my Ts, as I hide it from everyone else in my life, including hubby.

[PinkFlamingo99]

With my old one, no. She didn't really want to know. It made her upset.

My new one asks to see them, asks what I used, asks me to throw out what I used, we go through safety plan, talk about triggers and reasons for stopping, she usually tells me I need to start going for stitches when I need them, encourages me to get them looked at anyway, tells me to clean and bandage them, checks if they're infected the next few weeks, etc... Everything. I find it really helps to be able to talk about it and have help after dealing alone for so long.

[RedSun]

I emailed my T the first time we talked about it, I needed her to introduce the subject.
I did that again recently too, I struggle to bring it up.
She asked where, what thoughts were going through my head etc...I've got better at identifying triggers, I could tell her the scenario that set it off for the last two times.
Twice she has asked to see. First time I said no, second time I very briefly showed my arm.
I don't know if it helps.
Also, she was surprised I think when I emailed her recently...she said she hadn't seen any signs. Must have missed the massive plaster on my wrist then
She has asked me to stay with the feeling that I have before I cut, but tbh it's more thoughts than feelings...

[LonesomeTonight]

A couple months ago, I talked about urges I had to self-harm with my T, marriage counselor, and p-doc. I hadn't self-harmed in like 18 years, so it was weird to me having those thoughts. Then when I ended up cutting a couple weeks ago, I did tell them about it. But it was probably less of a shock because I'd already talked about the thoughts.

[Ad Intra]

I always try to be truthful. My old-T never asked to see them or if they were infected, she just reminded me she was there to help in between sessions.

[amalya]

THANK YOU all so much for sharing. it helps a lot.

my T is on vacation for the rest of the month (ouch), but when she's back i plan to be much more honest.
although i'm still worry about making her upset or very uncomfortable...

[Ad Intra]

Most T are bot made uncomfortable by self harm

[LonesomeTonight]

Originally Posted by Ad Intra

Most T are bot made uncomfortable by self harm

Agreed that T's have likely seen lots of cases of self-harm before and aren't likely to freak out unless they think you're actively suicidal. My p-doc wanted to check the cuts to make sure they didn't seem infected. My T acted normally toward me, though she was surprised to see how many cuts I'd made because I had downplayed it to her on the phone. My marriage counselor acted normally toward me, too, though he mostly works with teens, so he's probably seen lots of cases of self-harm. He did a good job of explaining to my husband the difference between self harm and wanting to end your life. And the reasons some people self-harm.