Stupid website...stupid family

The post i previously wrote about was i found a kids health site that said cutting was attention seeking and dramatic.

My entire life i was labeled dramatic.How i was i still dont understand, but whatever. When i was 11 i started self injury....and i sorta told/they found out (my parents) about it. To this day its a joke. A harsh joke that they find funny and use to hurt me. Everyone in my family pretty much knows. And no one actually thinks i have this pain. They see my parents as wonderful. And whenever i speak out it just enhances their idea that im a terrible kid...and my parents just point and say see....its like siblings...one breaks the cookie jar, sets up the other sibling and when the kid says i didnt do it everyone says you obiviously broke it...look at how nice your brother (the real culprit) is being ....

im in the exact same position..

I absolutely HATE the word dramatic. It is so judgmental ... especially in cases like this.

I'm so sorry you are feeling so hurt by your family. I think that the ones we love hurt us the most because it is their disapproval that can reinforce our doubts the most.

Hang in there and know that you have a loving community of people on here that care about you and understand your pain.

(((((hugs))))) - if ok
Jacq

(((((((((((( Inny )))))))))))))

I know the FEELING there guys!! Long ago back in the mid 70's I started to injure myself too. I was never a "cutter"
in the sense of the word, but I put my fist thru alot of doors,
walls, and GLASS picture frames. Only got cut once doing the glass thing. Oh yeah, and BRICK!!! My hands were always battered and bruised and swelled up due to the heavy torturing I'd do to myself. I called it "punishing" for not being able to stand up to my mother. I had a lot of pent up anger and frustrations at life in general. I was an angry
young girl that turned into an angrier young woman. I did that stuff for about 3 years until I got professional help. Near the end of the 70's they put me on every psychitropic drug therapy you could think of.............NONE of it worked. It
just puts that cement feeling in your brain.
After 30 some odd years I have a diagnosis and have since learned that it is NOT my fault. It's not something I could control. It's NOT behavioral.....................I hated myself
and I wanted to hurt something........so instead of hurting my little girl, I chose ME!!! It made more sense. Now I have scars today because of it. Little scars from glass, brick and what not.....................so sad. Today, I slip once in a blue moon, but nothing compared to what I use to do....not even close!!!

(((((inny))))))

i looked at myself the other night and wondered what it was about me that made ppl not care, not notice and/or ignore

why why why why why
if i had the tears i wood have cried an ocean and drowned
parents are cruel and i wish ppl could accept and stand up to their mistakes but it will never happen

im sorry inny for i know u never did anything wrong i know u to be a wonderful funny strong person

barney sings loud and proud