Lent

Hi Bill, I had a rough weekend, but I didn't give in and SH. So I'm at 92 days right now. Looking forward til I can get to triple digits. I have to decide what to do after Pentecost. I don't want to break a promise to God. Been praying a lot. The temptation is there to give in. But I'm being strengthened from within. Thanks for your prayers, and your friendship. HUGS Kit.

I feel like I'm going to relapse. I feel it in me, like in my bones. I'm trying to hang on but I feel like it's futile.

(((((((Kit)))))))

((((((((Kit)))))))))

I made it through yesterday. I still feel like I'm going to relapse. I haven't yet. I'm trying to hang on. Kit

Well done Kit!

One day, one hour, one minute at a time. 🙂

You are doing terrific!

Is this your longest time without SI?

What helped you yesterday to not SI?

Go SlumberKitty! Almost 100 days is such an accomplishment. I know you've been struggling recently but try to think of what things have helped you in the last few months and keep doing those things. I find the best thing when I want to SH is to get up and move. Go for a walk outside if you can. Sometimes removing myself from the situation until the feelings pass helps me. I know you can do this. If I can do it so can you

It's not my longest time without SH but one of the longest...I'm still doing my exercises and deep breathing and prayer (actually I exercised a bit less this week, bad weather and migraines). I'm more stressed though, work changes, financial problems, so my coping mechanisms are being overran by my emotions. I'm praying and I'm hanging on by my toenails. I just feel like a relapse is really close. I'm just trying to hang on. I see T tomorrow. Maybe she will give me some insights or something to help me not to give in. HUGS Kit

Thanks MsSunflower. I'm really trying. Exercise helps me too, I'm going to try to take a walk tomorrow because I've not exercised as much this week. And I see T tomorrow. So I'm going to try to hang in until I see T. Maybe she will give me some tools or techniques or something. Or we can work on my anxiety and feelings of failure or something that I'm dealing with and maybe I won't have to SH. HUGS Kit

I relapsed today. I couldn't keep going.

(((((((Kit)))))))

You did a great, excellent job over a long period of time!

Maybe you feel sad now, , but also remember how well you did.

When you are ready you can start another good long run!

Thanks Bill, it might take me a few days to get out of this cycle. I got to 98 days before I relapsed, so that's really good. I didn't make it to Pentecost though. So I'm a little disappointed in myself. HUGS Kit

Haven't been here in a bit. Sorry to hear you didn't make your goal but you still did so well! How's this week going for you?

Hi MsSunflower. This week is going better. Last week was a mess and I SH-ed on four days, but this week I'm clear of that now and trying to make it the rest of the way to Pentecost without any further SH. Maybe it's not a perfect path, but getting there in the end is still important to me. HUGS Kit

Thank you for the update Kit!

I agree that it is good to hang in there and aim for Pentecost again.

You have accomplished a lot of good things in the past three months and I know that you can keep up the good work!

Hugs!

Thanks Bill! Sometimes I gotta remind myself to get up when I fall down. =)

That's okay. We all have set backs. I'm glad you're trying again. We believe in you!

Thank you MsSunflower. I'm working on it. One day at a time. It's nice to know people are rooting for me and believing in me. HUGS Kit

Thinking of you today SlumberKitty!

HUGS

Me too. How've you been?

Hello SlumberKitty!

How have you been?

Hi Bill. Things have been crazy. So I haven't been around much. Hopefully I'll be around much more soon. How are you? HUGS Kit

I’m doing well, Kit, thanks for asking!

HUGS

I had T today. Talked to my T about my SH thoughts. They have been pretty bizarre. She thinks SH is a symptom of the depression, which is a symptom of unexpressed anger. Oh joy. So I was dissociating during session. But she helped bring me back. I feel more stable now than this morning. Good job T.

Tomorrow will be 50 days, but I'm struggling today. I'm trying to make it until the end of the month. Failure looms large. I haven't cut (yet) but it's there, right below the surface. Trying to get distracted. Trying to figure out why I am feeling this way. My T thinks it's unexpressed anger. I really don't feel angry but she said it's shoved way far down under a layer of terror so it's hard to get to. Glad I have my friends here on PC to help me through this. HUGS Kit