[SandyWeb]

I am feeling as though I need to cut, very deeply and final. My kids are away for the week and I am alone. I know that I am not safe right now. I slit my wrist in June, but the paramedics took me to the hospital and the ER doctor who stitched me up committed me to the Short-Term Crisis Unit. But now I feel like doing it again, and I'm not sure how to work through this. I think when you've done it once, it's easier to do again. I've looked at my razor blades, but I've put them back in the drawer. I just wanted to reach out to you guys tonight. Maybe talking will get my mind off these intrusive thoughts.

Hugs,
Sandy

[Zenobia]

Welcome Sandy, I am glad you found us.

If you are not safe you need to get to somewhere you will be safe. For some people that is the emergency room. It is better to go there before you cut then after. When I went there they just shot me full of ativan and sent me on my way after I promised to call my therapist in the morning. This would save you the longer stay. For some people it is better to go spend the night with a friend or family. That way you will find companionship to help soften the loneliness left by the kids being gone for the week. There are also crisis lines to call so you will have a human voice to fill that void. It is important that you do something now to make sure you are safe.
Carrie

<font color=blue>If you have two dollars, spend one on bread and the other on flowers. The bread will feed your body and the flowers will feed your soul."--Arabic Saying

[(JD)]

Just wanted to give you a WELCOME... sorry you are feeling this way... can you call your T and at least leave a message about how you are feeling? Try to distract yourself from these thoughts...and feelings... try to put it all off.... I know it must be hard to do...

there are plenty of caring ppl here... post again right now if you need to

<font color=green> ...slip sliding away... slip sliding away....

[emwell]

I have read every word of this thread. I am sorry you are feeling the way you do Sandyweb. I have been where you are many times. I so wish I could take your urges away for you but I can't.

I have read many really great suggestions for you in ohers posts. I love the idea of ripping out words and pictures from magazines. I may have to try that one myself if I ever need to.

Can you cry in your living room when the kids go to bed? Or even the bathroom....fire escape. I understand why your kids need their own rooms.

I also do not understand why you got set up with a T who can only see you for a few visits. That makes no sense to me. I would go one more time or at least until you find a more permanent one who you feel good about.

Be good to yourself, you deserve to give yourself a break, and hug your kids.

<font color=white>laughter really is the best medicine</font color=white>