mini attack

Last night one of my alters couldn't hold out any longer and did a mini attack on the arm... different than her usual style - i think she wanted to protest against me. She created mini stabs through my sweatshirt - so they're not even cuts, they''re like pin pricks and there's a lot of them. oh i guess she did get the hand with some mild scratches as well - i forgot. I am glad it is nothing very visible - dr. apnt tomorrow.
kiya

(((((((((((Kiya))))))))))))))) hope your doctor appt goes well. Is there anything you can do to keep yourself safe and your alters from lashing out physically upon yourself?

Be safe.

=) none that i know of yet. i just try to stay preoccupied.

ty for the hugs =)

(((((((((((Kiya))))))))))))
Are you feeling better today?

mmm... switchy today ty. but i don't have to go back to the mean boss and instead am being sent to a vet clinic =) that will be fun to work with animals (i love them) =) like a reward!!

Yay for the vet clinic. Get you away from that mean boss.

BB

kiya... i hope your doc appointment went well... how are you ?...lyn

OMG!!!!
I don't mean this in a bad way or victim way... it just is - it is interesting on one level and horrific on one level... and even fascnating... sort of.
So i thought i was going to be a receptionist at the vet - that was what i was sent there to do, eh... so i walk in
and was actually IN cat surgery!!! No joke! when I got there, the gal says "You're going in to surgery now" and hands me a face mask and some scrubs! Knowing I don't do well with blood, sharp objects (on multiple levels), and injections, there was a lot of switching going on for me internally. The cat also stopped breathing, so I was breathing for the cat - pumping air into it's lungs, monitoring its breathing and heart rate.... and when the cat did start breathing on its own, i had nothing to focus on and came *this* close to blacking out...room started swimming, shallow breathing, mouth tasted metallic - i tried breathing steady and counting to ten (like for the cat) then little lights started popping in front of my eyes and i started spinning... i got myself out of the room so that *when* i fainted, i wouldn't hit any of the instruments. But I got myself mostly back together (got some air, some water), checked on the cat and the dr until someone could relieve me. I tried to go back in, but started feeling bad again. So the rest of the day was covering phones (and shaking so badly that I could barely talk - cold? shock?) walking dogs to pee, cleaning exam rooms and the bloody instruments , loading dogs in to be bathed, holding down animals to be injected, helped clean a dog's teeth (who also kept dipping into scary numbers on the scanner and we had to jump in to revive it several times). Then vacuuming and mopping at day's end.
I mean woah!!!

Yikes!!!!! (((((((((((((Kiya)))))))))))))) I wouldn't have done very well in that sort of situation either, even though I really like animals.

That sure was a big change from receptionist. Are you going back or was it just a one day thing? If you are going to continue you may want to work out what you can and can not do. Sounds like you did that to get through yesterday. You certainly were busy.

BB

(((((((( Kiya ))))))))