ahh... i thought i was done with this

i was sitting in my room all alone my son is gone for the month visiting his dad and i did it something i haven't done in a long time. i feel ashamed and worthless i feel like i can't do anything right ... it had been a year since i injured... why now? I feel as if everything is piling in on me. with extreme summer triggers about past abuse and the stupid believe that it is my fault why can't i get past this? how long is it going to take for me to believe what happened to me is not my fault and that i don't deserve to be punished. it is like i can say it but i don't believe it .... i am so mad at myself! i know better than that i know it won't help but i feel all alone like no one cares and like it woundn't really matter ....

(((((((((((((((((((((ginniesky)))))))))))))))))))))))))) It sounds like you may be overwhelmed and could not find another way to deal with your strong emotions. You have a lot going on right now. On the top of the forum there are some ideas of things to do when you feel like SI. Maybe you could look through them and see if any of them seem like they may work for you.

It takes time to work through trauma. The guilt seems to come with the rest. Yes it is misplaced but it takes time to change the destructive thoughts.

I am sorry you are feeling so alone. Know I am here.

BB

((((((((((((ginniesky)))))))))))))

Maybe you need to have someone over that you can talk to, or go somewhere else where you feel safer?

I'm sorry you self-injured, but it is not your fault. Bad things happen, and stress can really cause someone a lot of emotional pain that is really hard to deal with.

I know you probably don't like this... but it takes time to believe that past bad things aren't your fault. You (as a whole) have to believe it... and some days it's easier than others.

I care, you know I care about you. I know you've got the power within you to hold on, I know you can do this.

Breathe. Ground yourself. Take a walk outside. Get some fresh air and a change of scenery.

Keep PMing me, because I like hearing from you... no matter what.



ps. Re-read the post in Kudos I made for you, and remember that you're cared about here, and loved.

(((((ginniesky)))))

babyg xXx

((((((((((((( ginniesky ))))))))))))))