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  #1  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 11:14 AM
Griffe
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Had to go to the hospital last night for this huge big ugly cut on my chest. erg

My regular doctor is going to kill me when he finds out. First my neck, refusing to take meds, withdrawal, everything else. Great, another reason for him to want to throw me in ward.

erg

Not that it matters, or that I matter, or that anyone cares. If other people can hurt me, why don't I deserve to hurt myself.

erg

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  #2  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 12:32 PM
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Der_Sohn_des_Leides Der_Sohn_des_Leides is offline
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((((Griffe))))

It does matter, Griffe, and so do you. You don't deserve to be hurt, either by others or yourself.

Are you physically okay? Sounds like a bad injury... More importantly, will you be able to stay safe?

Please take care of yourself and don't be so hard on yourself. You can do this.

Stay safe,

erg erg erg

J
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"One by one, as they march, our comrades vanish from our sight, seized by the silent orders of omnipotent death. Very brief is the time in which we can help them, in which their happiness or misery is decided. Be it ours to shed sunshine on their path, to lighten their sorrows by the balm of sympathy, to give them the pure joy of a never-tiring affection, to stregthen failing courage, to instill faith in hours of despair."
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With love and hope,
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  #3  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 02:21 PM
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bchlyn bchlyn is offline
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you matter... please be safe...lyn
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  #4  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 03:02 PM
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(((((((((((((((((((((Griffe))))))))))))))))))))))) You matter very much. Please stay safe.

BB
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erg


  #5  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 05:36 PM
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Kiya Kiya is offline
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Griffe? This may be off, but might some of the parts be *trying* to get you in a hospital? I know for me, my inner parts battle this one out. And i recall in "Girl Interrupted" she didn't want to go to th hospital, but once she was there and had a moment of dispersonalization, she was thinking "Now they can't send me home - now i'm crazy". It's in the book, not the movie.
Most of my parts fight to keep us out - but some really believe that the hospital might be the only safe place - the only place where'd we'd actually get the help we need. But the system was designed to maintain a functional appearance....
Does that make sense?
Hoping you are ok and that you can get what you need.
Kiya
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  #6  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 09:01 PM
Griffe
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Interesting idea, not sure. It's kind of been general idea in my system that doctors, medication and hospitals have all = unsafe and bad, but Maybe they would rather be in hospital. Hmm, I got some thinking to do.

As for staying safe, I don't know, that depends. erg

Thanks you guys. erg
  #7  
Old Jul 12, 2008, 10:37 PM
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Christina86 Christina86 is offline
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(((((((((Griffe)))))))))))))))

Stay safe. Go to the hospital if you need to. We want you to have the best support possible, because we care about you here.
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erg
  #8  
Old Jul 13, 2008, 12:15 PM
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x_BabyG_x x_BabyG_x is offline
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Please stay safe Griffe, you matter to so much of us here.

Im sorry you are having a hard time right now, keep talking to us

babyg xXx
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  #9  
Old Jul 13, 2008, 03:20 PM
Griffe
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Sorry to whine. You all have better things to read.

Girlfriend is in hospital, I'm in pain, stupid bloody withdrawal, yeah, I don't see much point in not cutting. I'm stupid and I don't matter. I have nothing good about me.

%&$%*&^( At least hurting myself or drinking myself into oblivion makes sense.
erg erg erg erg
  #10  
Old Jul 13, 2008, 03:39 PM
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x_BabyG_x x_BabyG_x is offline
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stop banging your head against walls griffe!!!

at least your not going to cut tonight, thats the first step x
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~ HEY! I run a site on mental health called The Manic Years. I'm looking for some brave souls to share their own personal encounters with mental health. Are you up for sharing your story? Please get in touch on themanicyears@gmail.com. Thank you ~

Follow my blog here; http://themanicyears.com

Lola Olivia ~ 7/11/11 ~ my reason for breathing

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  #11  
Old Jul 13, 2008, 03:55 PM
Abby Abby is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2003
Posts: 826
While there's life, there's hope.
erg

You're NOT stupid, you DO matter and there are SO MANY good things about you.

I get that it makes sense to you, but i've learnt depression messes with our logic. Hurting yourself doesn't make sense because you want to get better, drinking alcohol is a depressant so will make you feel worse so also doesn't make sense.

Maybe someone can bring you the twins, have them lie in your arms instead? You matter very much to them erg
  #12  
Old Jul 13, 2008, 07:33 PM
Anonymous32721
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(((((((griffe))))))) hope kate is out soon. i know withdrawal is horrible erg but remember it is for something good. and kate would like you to quit! sending you happy thoughts and hugs.
You DO matter and there are GREAT things about you. i am gonna start a list mate! expect it tomorrow!
  #13  
Old Jul 14, 2008, 02:36 PM
Griffe
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erg

I just want to give up. It's so easy to say I'm fine when I'm obviously not. I don't see a point in not giving up or sticking around.

erg
  #14  
Old Jul 14, 2008, 03:40 PM
Anonymous29368
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<font color="purple">You shouldn't give up because you are a wonderful person and there are alot of people who really love and care about you. </font>
  #15  
Old Jul 14, 2008, 04:12 PM
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Typo Typo is offline
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((((((((((Griffe)))))))))))))

I'm so sorry I didn't see this sooner.
Rember to breathe hun, it will be okay, everyone here on PC cares very much and is here with you.
I'm sorry to hear about Kate, I hope she comes home soon.

You are a wonderful, caring person, don't let the lies the deprression tells you win, because they are just lies, the truth is that you are a great friend and you care very much about people.

I hope you get to feeling better, rember I care very much and so do many others here on Pc and IRL. I am here if you ever need to talk.
erg erg erg erg erg erg erg erg
Sending lots and lots of gentle hugs and safe thoughts
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