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#1
Jul 20, 2008, 05:52 PM
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I admit I am (sometimes) weak.
I admit I've been thinking about SI again. I admit that I'm scared that I'll relapse. I guess I apologize. I want to be able to be supportive of people, but I let triggers get the better of me. I know, self-care first (as I've said to others), but I still feel badly for not being here. August 20th marks 1.5 years of being free from self-injury. Some days the urge isn't there. Some days it is. Some days I feel so weak like I'm about to give in... But I don't, and I'm not sure why. I guess I want to mess up to prove once again that I'm a "screw up" who can't do anything that she sets her mind to. But I won't. I'm scared of not being a "screw up". Weird. But I'm not. Nobody is, because this is a hard thing to beat. Thanks for reading my rambling.
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#2
Jul 20, 2008, 06:53 PM
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Christina86 said: Some days I feel so weak like I'm about to give in... But I don't, and I'm not sure why. </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> I think you know why you dont give into it. I think its because deep down you know that you are better than that and you do have the strength to fight the urge, so you dont give into it. I think once self injurers get addicted, even if they SI free for time, even years, they still have the urges and they will still think about it. I think its because once you feel it, and experience why we think it helps us in desperate times, we can never forget. No, we can never forget, but we can ALWAYS fight it take care hun, babyg xXx
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~ HEY! I run a site on mental health called The Manic Years. I'm looking for some brave souls to share their own personal encounters with mental health. Are you up for sharing your story? Please get in touch on themanicyears@gmail.com. Thank you  ~Follow my blog here; http://themanicyears.com Lola Olivia ~ 7/11/11 ~ my reason for breathing Bipolar Affective Disorder type 2 - (2013) 'Borderline traits' Dissociative episodes |
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#3
Jul 20, 2008, 09:39 PM
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you are much stronger then you know... take care of you first...lyn
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lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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#4
Jul 20, 2008, 11:47 PM
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You have given support to me and I wish I could do that for you! I'm not in my best days but even behind the dark cloud around me I can tell that you are a strong person. Keep fighting! You can do it!
(((((Christina))))) |
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#5
Jul 21, 2008, 12:42 PM
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Being honest like that is a form of healing. Thanks for sharing.
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 Happy fall my friends
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#6
Jul 21, 2008, 04:26 PM
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Christina86 said: Some days the urge isn't there. Some days it is. Some days I feel so weak like I'm about to give in... But I don't, and I'm not sure why. I guess I want to mess up to prove once again that I'm a "screw up" who can't do anything that she sets her mind to. But I won't. I'm scared of not being a "screw up". Weird. But I'm not. Nobody is, because this is a hard thing to beat. </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> Christina, you speak for me too. I admit it too. It can be beaten...as you say, one day at a time. |
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#7
Jul 21, 2008, 07:00 PM
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((((((((((((((( Christina )))))))))))))))))
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#8
Jul 21, 2008, 07:53 PM
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(((((((((((Christina)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
you said"I admit I am (sometimes) weak." we all are hon every now and then. You are such a wonderful person You are so supportive to everyone DO not forget your self Go to bed early eat, rest, take care of you You are wise beyond your years I am sorry you are going threw a hard time Its allowed we all do... your human remember Please take care of you (((you matter))))))))))))))))))))))) so very much muffy |
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#9
Jul 21, 2008, 08:22 PM
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Yep yep yep!!! All these posts speak truth miss christina.
((((((Strength to you!!!!!))))))))
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Credits: ChildlikeEmpress and Pseudonym for this lovely image.   alt="Universal Life Church | ULC" border="0">
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#10
Jul 26, 2008, 01:26 AM
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Oh my, I didn't respond to this! I read it though
 Thank you all for your support. One more day free from cutting, one day closer to my anniversary.  (((((((((((((BabyG, Lyn, maldosan, MINIME, Abby, Fuzzy, Muffy, Kiya))))))))))) you all are great. Thanks.
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#11
Jul 26, 2008, 08:56 AM
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Hugs-Angel
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Peace does not dwell in outward things, but within the soul... Angel |
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#12
Jul 26, 2008, 04:24 PM
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your doing great christine... keep up the fight...lyn
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lyn one could do worse then be a swinger of birches. ~robert frost~
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