I have not cut in six weeks or so but know i have the urge very badly and i know it is wrong i brought a uliilty knife and really want to use it to cut really bad i usually do not go deep just enough to draw blood but this time i want to go really deep iam ashamed of this

[notz]

Lo,

I understand how that feeling can be. Everything will just be going along and all of a sudden - that thought will crop up. And the more you think about it the bigger it gets.

You've got to get your mind off of it, it'll just keep feeding on itself if you don't. Go to bed and go to sleep. Do it now. If you don't sleep then read the suggestions at the top of the section. There are some very good techniques you can use.

Lo, please don't cut. Go to bed and go to sleep.

notz

sorry to say i scratched or cut a little to draw blood but not alot sorry to diappoint you

[notz]

no, Lo darling, you don't disappoint me. I just want for you not to hurt you. Have you read the grounding techniques? They can be very helpful.

Wanting you to be good to you,
notz

[DoggyBonz]

First, you are not a loser - sorry your sign on name just struck me as another way to feel bad about yourself.
Also, there is nothing wrong with you and you are not disappointing anyone but possibly yourself.
You are in pain and that internal pain is leading to a reaction. Maybe you can talk to a therapist about it or if you are in school a counselor.
Whatever is going on is hard stuff to deal with but there is another side and doing the exercises stated and talking are ways to build a foundation to feeling better.

[Christina86]

((((((((((((NOT a loser37)))))))))))))))

I'm sorry that it got that bad. But you can control it, because you didn't do it too badly. That's *really* good - that means you've still got enough control.

Get rid of the utility knife. Bury it outside if that helps. Put it somewhere where you can't see it.

Be good to yourself.