[gypsyprincess]

I HATE HIM! i hate my boyfriend! I just made a move on him. well i've done what has become the equivalent to a move in our relationship. He has rejected me so many times in the past 4 years and called me a sex addict for trying to initiate sex with him on days when we hadnt had sex in weeks. So, now I don't make a move, I open the door in case he is interested. I sat on his lap and rubbed my breasts in his face. To some guys that might be considered a move but to my boyfriend, it's just my way of forcefully getting attention from him, although Im really not aggressive and he doesnt think im aggressive. Anyway, after a few minutes of that, he told me to get off. To be fair, I Should mention that we are both in law school. And we have exams coming up in a few days.
He is an abusive F***!!!!!!!!!!!! (he just asked me what i was doing and he asked me if i was writing in my diary and i told him yes because i didnt want him to know i was typing here, and his reply was "I knew it" and i said "why?" and he said "because I know things like that, I knew you were going to write in your diary". HE KNOWS! HE KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING TO ME@!@@$# BUT HE DOESNT CARE!!! HE JUST WANTS TO PASS HIS LAW SCHOOL EXAMS!! WE HAVENT HAD SEX IN TWO WEEKS! HE STUDIES LIKE CRAZY. FIVE MINUTES OF UNFULFILLING SEX IS NOT GOING TO MAKE HIM FAIL! HE'S A SELFISH A$!%$!$#!@. HE DOESNT CARE ABOUT MY NEEDS. IM GOING CRAZY. I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by gypsyprincess

I sat on his lap and rubbed my breasts in his face.

Well if that doesn't work, he's not interested!

It certainly looks like he is not meeting your sexual needs. Yet you haven't said you are leaving him, or even thinking about leaving him. Perhaps he is good for you in other ways?

[gypsyprincess]

Originally Posted by CantExplain

Well if that doesn't work, he's not interested!

It certainly looks like he is not meeting your sexual needs. Yet you haven't said you are leaving him, or even thinking about leaving him. Perhaps he is good for you in other ways?

I've been thinking about leaving him since the second month of our relationship. I was too in love with him then to follow through with it and i was too in love with him up until last May when he broke my heart. Now I'm still with him out of guilt. It's ironic. The second I stop wanting him, he professes his love, follows me to another country and chooses to go to the same law school im going to even though he had better options. And he's made genuine efforts to change a lot of the things that he did wrong in the past - he was very emotionally abusive. But he's actually changed, in some significant ways. For a while we were having sex more frequently than usual, but it was always when he wanted it, not when i wanted it. But ever since exam season started, he's been very stressed and his low sex drive goes even lower. Although i dont even think its just the low sex drive. He just doesnt want to waste time he could be studying, having sex with me. Although it's not like we have ever had sex longer than 20 mins if it even comes close to that. I don't want him anymore. (To be completely honest, I'm even in love with another man, except that's another complicated issue since we dont live in the same country and probably have no future. ) But I've tried to put the effort in to fall in love with him again, but i can't get over the past and this sex thing exacerbates everything, because even if i somehow were able to fall in love with him again, he could never give me what i need.
I'm just waiting and trying to figure out how to break up with him.. the guilt is so heavy on my shoulders. I almost resent him for that too.

[likewater]

Sex is a very complicated issue. there could be many reasons he doesnt want sex and none of them have anything to do with you. It could be stress from exams , although sex is a stress reliever. He needs to talk with you about what is really going on. You can' t be understabding if you don' t know what it is you are supposed to understand. It's not fair to you for him to simply refuse you
physical attention with no explanation.

[likewater]

Also, forget the guilt. If you want to move on, move on. You don't owe him. It sounds like he has been manipulating you.