Conflicting thoughts on being dominated

Sometimes I enjoy the feeling, in fact its almost the only real way I can get turned on, but at other times I am repulsed by it.

Particularly when I see images or descriptions of it in mainstream accepted media.

For example, the following pic is so hot to me, yet eventually I start thinking that maybe it's sexist too.

Fetishes are often times very conflicting. We are led to believe that anything astray from the normal is wrong, immoral. But often times, our fetishes are very much commonplace, particularly those of domination/submission. People like to control and be controlled, and often times it's in the bedroom where we get to play out exactly who we want to be.

I am quite submissive in real life, but I like to take on the Nazi get up to be in full control during sex. I feel sexy and powerful and in control, whereas in real life I feel stepped on and ugly and powerless.

Thanks Skipper, that articulated it all very well for me.

but you said that you were too pretty to be single!

I feel the same way most of the time. I have been in an on-again-off-again "relationship" with this one man for about three years now. I'm always submissive to him and it definitely gets my rocks off but sometimes I feel ashamed of myself for the things I allow him to do. It feels good in the moment but then I think about it objectively from a psychological perspective and it makes me feel sick. You're definitely not alone.

Not really. I think I'm very unattractive.

Sorry, but I was not conjecturing:

Just saying that I was not making any assumptions.

That doesn't mean anything. Doesn't mean that it's set in stone or that I believe it. I don't get why you'd hold on to that belief of something I said three months ago when I was sexually frustrated of not getting anywhere in life.

I was just going purely on the strength of written statements. I did not mean to imply anything and I am sorry if you do not always think that you are attractive.

It seems to me, on the basis of facts, that a couple of attempts at having a bf in your recent past went to waste for reasons that have nothing to do with lack of attractiveness. It seemed that there was no lack of attractiveness .

But I also get that you might hold beliefs about your (in?)attractiveness that are counter to reality - many of us do that from time to time.