Your ultimate fantasy/partner

I read that try to hold on to a ping pong ball while bound and gagged and then drop it as your safeword, or to make certain noises or grunts while gagged.

Sometimes I let her hurt me a little. I don't mind the whip stinging or my hair being pulled.

I think the one painful thing I'd really love to do is to use nipple clamps.

I bought them once at a seedy shop in SF as a decoration. They are horribly painful. I would not ever put them on again. But I am not into BDSM - I just wanted what looked like a curious way to decorate the chest. I now use necklaces for that purpose and the decoration is there without any pain.

Never did those. I sometimes write my fantasies down. I'm not going to post them here though.

My wife tried those. That is the only time i saw her have a squirting orgasm without using her favorite vibrating egg. The clamp had a chain that went up to a leather collar. She was very pleased.

Wow, I didn't know they were that orgasmic. Honestly, tmi, I really like tugging at my nipples. But Hamster makes a good point, they can be very painful, so I have to make sure I use one that are more dull or less painful.

Do you ever fantasize about being the opposite sex and having sex as the opposite sex?

I am worried, too, because you have a whole laundry list of expectations, and every item on your list reduces the range of options for you. So I am afraid that by adding more and more to the list, you might eventually drive the range of options down to zero for yourself. Also, you seem to be quite unusual in that you fantasize about some really unusual things that involve power, paddles, and other such things and yet at the same time thinking about a guy's penis touching you (which is not something unusual and is quite mundane for most people) is too scary. This is just fascinating, of course, but seems to be highly unusual, and the more unusual you are, the harder it is to find a match. Not impossible, but just that - much harder.

I bought mine in a seedy shop in SF passing by and being curious, on an impulse. It is quite possible that by reading consumer reports online carefully, and/or by asking sales assistants at a high quality sex shop, you can find gentler ones. Keep us posted then!

The ones we have are like aligator clips but they have a rubber coating and ther is an adjustment screw so they aren't too tight. She says pain gets her endorphines up and makes everything feel better.

Fantasies are just an outlet, they are just fantasies and it masks the underlying issues. I intend on discussing my fantasies and fetishes with my counselor to uncovering the real issues troubling me and build up self-confidence. She even gave me the number to a sex counselor who is said to be really good. I built up my fantasies to hide from what's really bugging me. Most of my fantasies are just phases and I will likely grow out of them.

Although, I've spent $500 on paraphernalia and I'd like to put them to good use. I think with my certain fantasy it will be fairly easy to get him on board with it as long as he is into submission. Submission is surprisingly common in men, and I think that a submissive guy would love to be subdued by me no matter what uniform I wear. The controversy of the uniform might just make the outfit that much hotter. For now, I have my uniform hidden under my bed. I haven't actually worn the uniform in months.

Do you realize that you might initiate the break-up? Probably with as much ex ante likelihood? Meaning - you might be as likely to leave him as he might be likely to leave you.

Either way, I'll still end up alone after becoming intimate and giving my body to someone else. I don't want to talk about it anymore.

Life has a way of being unpredictable.. you just never know. Sometimes you'll end up alone and wish you weren't and sometimes you'll end up with someone and wish you weren't

Brad Pitt, but only in Inglourious Basterds. I don't seem to like him in any other film. But he makes a damn good Yankee.

You don't like Brad Pitt in Fight Club?

I've never watched Fight Club. I don't really like his hair when it's long.

It's not long in Fight Club. You have to watch it. You'll LOVE him in it.

Johnny Depp is interesting, because I only like him in character, I don't really fantasize about him just as Johnny Depp.

I'm trying to imagine a fantasy with Johny Depp's Willy Wonka. Sounds disturbing really.

Actually, I was beyond obsessed with Johnny Depp's Willy Wonka all through middle school. It was so bad that my mom had to go in my room, rip down the posters and everything else related to him and throw them in the trash.

My crush in middle school was Kristen Dunst.

The weirdest bit was that I was absolutely TERRIFIED of Michael Jackson back then. And yet Willy Wonka looked just like him and invited a bunch of children into his factory. That's another "What I don't get".

Hmm never thought of the Michael Jackson comparison. He plays a weirdo in every Tim Burton film. I love Edward Scissorhands though