[Angel of Bedlam]

So I went ans saw my pdoc today and she prescribed me an antidepressant. I know that antidepressants are notorious for killing your sex drive. My boyfriend and I DON'T WANT THIS! Our sex life is great, like REALLY great. It is one of the ways we connect and it's the best either of us have had.

I'm scared because even 9 months into our relationship, I still lust for him just like when we started. I DON'T wanna lose that. My question is, how badly do antidepressants affect your drive? Is there a way to stop it from dragging that down. Thanks for listening.

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[Webgoji]

It depends on the antidepressant. You should keep a close eye on it and if you find that one is depressing your sex drive, switch to another. I took one that completely killed my sex drive within a week, but the one I'm on now (venlafaxine or Effexor) only has intermittent anorgasmic side effects. But my sex drive is the same as when I was 25.

I've had to go through about 7, maybe 10, AD's before I found one that worked with the least number of side effects and, like you, the sexual side effects were the really important ones for my wife and I.

Long story short, you may have to test around and try several before you find the one that works, but there's one out there that won't kill your sex drive and will work for you.

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by Webgoji

It depends on the antidepressant. You should keep a close eye on it and if you find that one is depressing your sex drive, switch to another. I took one that completely killed my sex drive within a week, but the one I'm on now (venlafaxine or Effexor) only has intermittent anorgasmic side effects. But my sex drive is the same as when I was 25.

I've had to go through about 7, maybe 10, AD's before I found one that worked with the least number of side effects and, like you, the sexual side effects were the really important ones for my wife and I.

Long story short, you may have to test around and try several before you find the one that works, but there's one out there that won't kill your sex drive and will work for you.

I tried Zoloft that made me sick, and was now switched to Paxil. Any experience with that med?

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

My experience with Cymbalta has been good, although I was unable to ejaculate for the first month or so on that medication.

[Webgoji]

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

I tried Zoloft that made me sick, and was now switched to Paxil. Any experience with that med?

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

Zoloft was useless to me. If anything, my depression got worse actually. Paxil made me numb. I couldn't think or feel or anything, I just kinda sat and drooled on myself.

But each SSRI or SSNRI will affect everyone differently. My wife takes citalopran (Celexa) and it works great for her. She has the sex drive of, lol, a 38 year old woman, i.e. she could wear out an 18-year old boy. It doesn't cause any other side effects for her that we can tell.

Citalopran didn't work worth a darn for me. It made me extremely anorgasmic. I had to switch to Effexor (venlafaxine) which keeps me going better than anything.

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by Webgoji

Zoloft was useless to me. If anything, my depression got worse actually. Paxil made me numb. I couldn't think or feel or anything, I just kinda sat and drooled on myself.

But each SSRI or SSNRI will affect everyone differently. My wife takes citalopran (Celexa) and it works great for her. She has the sex drive of, lol, a 38 year old woman, i.e. she could wear out an 18-year old boy. It doesn't cause any other side effects for her that we can tell.

Citalopran didn't work worth a darn for me. It made me extremely anorgasmic. I had to switch to Effexor (venlafaxine) which keeps me going better than anything.

Are you referring to that dirty 30's thing that my boyfriend cautions me about? Idk if it'll be the same for me, I can't imagine my drive getting much larger. I think I'm gonna wait on the Paxil... but the only way I'll know is if I try... just scared to so it!

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[Erti]

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

I tried Zoloft that made me sick, and was now switched to Paxil. Any experience with that med?

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

I'm currently taking anti-depressants and anti-psychotics. I'm talking Paxil and Zyprexa. I'm not sure if it's one or both that's killing my sex drive.

[Harley47]

I don't have personal experience with antidepressants, but I've family that do, including Paxil. If memory serves, no ill effects were reported under the Paxil...granted, it was a low dose and it was their first antidepressant (so they complained a bit about feeling "sluggish"), but no other effects were reported that I'm aware of.

Of course, it varies wildly from person to person...why not try it for a bit, see how it works, and go from there? You can always transfer off if it's not to your liking. If your sex life goes so far from "REALLY great" to just plain old boring "great," let your doctor know. They can help you find something that works and doesn't take off that "REALLY" part.

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by Harley47

I don't have personal experience with antidepressants, but I've family that do, including Paxil. If memory serves, no ill effects were reported under the Paxil...granted, it was a low dose and it was their first antidepressant (so they complained a bit about feeling "sluggish"), but no other effects were reported that I'm aware of.

Of course, it varies wildly from person to person...why not try it for a bit, see how it works, and go from there? You can always transfer off if it's not to your liking. If your sex life goes so far from "REALLY great" to just plain old boring "great," let your doctor know. They can help you find something that works and doesn't take off that "REALLY" part.

I'll try taking it tomorrow... we'll see what it does...

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[Webgoji]

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

Are you referring to that dirty 30's thing that my boyfriend cautions me about? Idk if it'll be the same for me, I can't imagine my drive getting much larger. I think I'm gonna wait on the Paxil... but the only way I'll know is if I try... just scared to so it!

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

Don't be scared, worst case scenario it doesn't work so well for you and you have to try a different AD. That's the way they are, you just have to find the one that works best for you. Again, my wife is on citralopran is has great results, but I had to go to venlafaxine. You'll just have to find what works. Think of it as learning to ride a bike, you'll fall a few times, but you'll eventually get the hang of it.


And yeah, the "Dirty 30's" hit my wife at about 35. It's not really a hormonal sexual peak like men get at 18 (and lasts for 24 hours before beginning to drop off ) it's more that a woman has matured enough that she knows what she wants and is more comfortable with herself. (Hehe, there comes a special time in a woman's life when ... )

Your sex drive itself may not go up so much, but you'll likely become more ... adventurous. By the 30's women have done quite a bit and want to start spicing things up. My wife over a few years went from cuddly love-making to "GRAB THAT BELT AND HIT ME YOU DIRTY BOY!!" (Seriously, I'm still trying to work it all out in my head ...) So yeah, tell your boyfriend to just bite down on something 'cause it's gonna be a wild ride.

[danvb]

I've been using Bupropion for a number of years. It's worked very well for me. It's fundamentally different from the commonly prescribed SSRI antidepressants such as Paxil and Zoloft in that it is a non-trycyclic antidepressant. I used Zoloft for a few years but it caused anorgasmia enough to warrant my switch to Bupropion. Bupropion has no sexual side effects whatsoever... none. It also doesn't cause weight gain like SSRI's sometimes tend to do. In addition to that, it seems to greatly reduce the number and severity of my depressive episodes much better than Zoloft.

Dan

[vans1974]

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

So I went ans saw my pdoc today and she prescribed me an antidepressant. I know that antidepressants are notorious for killing your sex drive. My boyfriend and I DON'T WANT THIS! Our sex life is great, like REALLY great. It is one of the ways we connect and it's the best either of us have had.

I'm scared because even 9 months into our relationship, I still lust for him just like when we started. I DON'T wanna lose that. My question is, how badly do antidepressants affect your drive? Is there a way to stop it from dragging that down. Thanks for listening.

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

Hey Angel-What AD did she prescribe. Aplenzin/Viibryd and Nefazodone are the only ones that won't effect your sex life. Typically any SSRI does have a negative impact, but everyone responds differently. Best of luck!

[danvb]

Did she prescribe an antidepressant or a med for your BPD?

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by danvb

Did she prescribe an antidepressant or a med for your BPD?

Well my med list is as follows: 1200mg neurotin, 200mg hydroxizine, 25mg trazadone, 200mg lamictal, and now the 20mg of paxil. It's for a combination of anxiety, mood regulation, and I guess depression too. Idk, they're all related to my BPD.

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[danvb]

Ah, that's quite a cocktail of happy pills!

Neurontin - For: mood stabilization and treatment-resistant depression
Hydroxyzine - For: anxiety
Trazodone - SARI antidepressant - For: major depression, anxiety
Lamictal - For: BPD, depression
Paxil - SSRI antidepresant - For: depression

Hmmmm... Yeah, it looks like the only drug there that can and really muck up your sex life is the Paxil... and it's the one that's newly prescribed.

My wife was on Paxil for a short time about 10 years ago when she was having some issues at work.

She and I would always have a good laugh in bed when she'd a l m o s t "get there" and it would just vanish "poof!" It was gone and there was nothing we could do to get her there again... What was REALLY funny was that I was on Zoloft at about the same time... So, yeah, "I was ALMOST there... Yeah, me too!" God, we had some good, uproariously funny laughs over it.

Anyway, I would certainly talk with your pdoc about switching to a drug with no such side effects SOON!

Dan

[Webgoji]

Originally Posted by danvb

So, yeah, "I was ALMOST there... Yeah, me too!" God, we had some good, uproariously funny laughs over it.

Same dang things my wife and I went through! Al ... most ... there ... DOH!

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by Webgoji

Same dang things my wife and I went through! Al ... most ... there ... DOH!

Not gonna lie, I feel bad for her! I would never want to be ALLLL... MOSSSST...THERE!

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[danvb]

Originally Posted by Webgoji

Same dang things my wife and I went through! Al ... most ... there ... DOH!

Yeah... I'm just sitting here laughing as I think about it again... DOH!!!

Dan

[danvb]

Originally Posted by Angel of Bedlam

Not gonna lie, I feel bad for her! I would never want to be ALLLL... MOSSSST...THERE!

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

Well, it certainly is frustrating, but to take it too seriously makes it much worse. We both laugh a LOT in bed (I just hate it when she laughs and points at the same time though...) so, it's much better to find humor in things like that instead of getting upset over something you can't do much about.

So, we'd laugh about it like we had good sense... and then snuggle and giggle like little idiots.

Dan

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by danvb

Well, it certainly is frustrating, but to take it too seriously makes it much worse. We both laugh a LOT in bed (I just hate it when she laughs and points at the same time though...) so, it's much better to find humor in things like that instead of getting upset over something you can't do much about.

So, we'd laugh about it like we had good sense... and then snuggle and giggle like little idiots.

Dan

I think it would drive Seth crazy if I couldn't get there. But I imagine if this were the case, we would just laugh. He basically doesn't want me to take it unless I feel a low coming on... which is weird because I'm not diagnosed bipolar...

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[danvb]

It would drive Seth crazy huh? Wow. No pressure there!

I dunno... I think that would make ME crazy if I thought my better half was feeling under pressure to perform for me. I mean, I KNOW that sometimes she doesn't really care about having an orgasm... that she just wants to enjoy being enjoyed... and being close.

Anyway...

I'm glad that you and Seth are doing well... That makes me happy.

Dan

[Angel of Bedlam]

Originally Posted by danvb

It would drive Seth crazy huh? Wow. No pressure there!

I dunno... I think that would make ME crazy if I thought my better half was feeling under pressure to perform for me. I mean, I KNOW that sometimes she doesn't really care about having an orgasm... that she just wants to enjoy being enjoyed... and being close.

Anyway...

I'm glad that you and Seth are doing well... That makes me happy.

Dan

We are! We had a rough month but the start of the New Year has really been good for us. Hence I think even more fear of a new "happy pill." The worry there being that it would have adverse effects and take us backward rather than ahead.

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[danvb]

Perhaps not backwards, just in a different direction... Know that you love each other... and keep that foremost in your mind and you can get through anything. I know that Julie and I have.

There ARE other options available that don't have the nasty side effects. I hope you explore those options...

Dan

[Angel of Bedlam]

Thread update:

I am on day 3 of Paxil. Our sex life has hit a bit of a wall, but I think that's due to outside influences. How long will it take before I know the side effects of it?

Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

[Webgoji]

A couple of weeks for most people. I'm a bit weird in that I start feeling them within a few days.