[Orbit26]

Hello all, and thank you for reading. Now, I may not have did the most in depth search, but I'm going to ask you all about a topic that I haven't seen much of on this section-- Asexuality.

By Asexuality, I do not mean reproducing without a partner. What I mean is the refraining from relationships or sex. I am in a really strange situation. I both do, and don't, want to be asexual.

I am not all that right in the head, and combined with my libido, I have a strange desire for females currently. However, I am socially inept (albeit, not to the degree of some of my friends, but I digress.)

In short, I've never been successful with people. I am heavily disliked for the opposite gender for a multitude of reasons (lack of intelligence, lack of social skills, unattractive, socially inept, shy, etc...)

Despite my overbearing stance against misanthropy, I am finding myself wishing to distance myself from others every day. In some ways, humans are beautiful, intelligent, fascinating creatures.

However, in other ways, humans can be disgusting, mentally inept, and terrible creatures. Though, don't think I dislikes humans for one second-- I would argue humans are my favorite animals, honestly.

And, to be honest, my failings with relationships has led me to disdain others and the ideas of relationships. It hurts me to know the happiness others derive from a situation in which I cannot obtain.

Though, sometimes, when I contemplate the idea of withdrawing from it all, and secluding myself, I find a bit of comfort. Though, something is always yearning inside of me to seek the companionship of others, even when it is harmful to my well-being.

I'd like to know what you all think. I'd like to thank you for reading, and have a good day.

[LiteraryLark]

It sounds like you can't make up your mind. I don't think this has anything to do with sexuality.

[Orbit26]

Originally Posted by DrSkipper

It sounds like you can't make up your mind. I don't think this has anything to do with sexuality.

Good to see you could derive something -- Though, how is it not related to sexuality exactly?

[LiteraryLark]

There's only one sentence explicitly regarding your asexuality. The rest is about how you're inept and can't make up your mind about whether you appreciate human beings.

[Orbit26]

Originally Posted by DrSkipper

There's only one sentence explicitly regarding your asexuality. The rest is about how you're inept and can't make up your mind about whether you appreciate human beings.

Fair enough-- I don't mean to ramble like that. Though, I posted that all as it relates to my asexual ideals, as it is the direct result of those feelings. I feel that if I can explain why I feel a certain way, and I am asking for advice/thoughts of others, it is better to explain why I feel the way I do. I am asking everyone's thoughts on the asexual idea, and not on everything else I posted-- everything else in there was simply an explanation as to why I may be feeling the way I do.

Well, to begin with and off topic, are you a writer? You write very well and are clearly intelligent. It would be a loss for others if you "secluded" yourself....
Humans are social creatures so seeking others' company is natural.....Unless your demons tell you otherwise...

That said, if you want to refrain from sex, then do so. There are no rules. The sex police will not come knocking on your door.

Hmm. Well, I consider myself pretty asexual so I guess I'll try to answer as best as I can.

First of, not wanting a relationship and not wanting sex are very different things. They are called Aromantic and Asexual respectively. Many asexuals actually really like cuddling and holding hands with people but the act of sex really does nothing for them. Now, asexuality has a wide range since it's difficult to fully define (as I'm sure you've read about to some extent) but if you aren't opposed to sexual relationships with some girl then I don't think you would fall under the category of asexual. For example, if there was someone (anyone you found attractive) that wanted to have sex with you, would you want to do it? That really sums it up fairly simply. Now, some asexuals do masturbate (there are very iffy definitions when it comes to asexuals haha) but the most important question is if you would do it with someone else.

The rest of what you have mentioned is just a distaste for how people view you in general. Most people will always yearn for some sort of companionship whether it be friends or lovers but what you describe fits more into a mixture of social beliefs and personality traits and much less to do with sexuality.

[Webgoji]

It sounds like you are less "asexual" as feeling bitter and rejected. I may be reading into what you said, but it sounds to me as if you would be interested in enjoying sex if you were to find the partner; someone who is caring and affectionate. I think the more you try to achieve an asexual view, the more frustrated you'll become.

[hamster-bamster]

You do write well and - I agree with Sophiesmom - are clearly intelligent.

So it is weird that you'd say that people have shunned you for lack of intelligence. I can see, however, how they would shun you, but not for lack of intellect. But first let me ask you a question. How old are you?

your writing style does not seem consistent with being young, and yet the content suggests that you are young and figuring things out. To me there is too much of a cognitive dissonance - please clarify.