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#1
Jun 04, 2014, 12:47 AM
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Okay so I take SSRI for my anxiety. Zoloft. Xanax for panic attacks, but that's only as needed. Me and my boyfriend are great together, and we love each other, but... unfortunately anxiety and sex go hand and hand for me. I didnt have a bad experience, its just that I worry that I'm not good enough , and I discuss this with him and he comforts me and such. But my main problem is... because of my SSRI I cannot orgasm. Being a normal person, I should go to my doctor and discuss adding or changing meds right? Wrong. I'm kind of young. I'm 16 (17 in a couple days) I am very careful, and responsible. On birth control and we always use protection. So I don't have to worry about that too much. But.. I don't know what to do. Is there anything I can do? I dont think so. I mean we do have intercourse but I do it mainly for his enjoyment. Anyways sorry for rambling. I just can't really talk about this with anyone.
Thank you.. Sent from my DROID BIONIC using Tapatalk |
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#2
Jun 04, 2014, 10:54 AM
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Hi, I can't help you much about your inability to orgasm. The only way is to talk to your doctor. Anything you say to them is confidential. Does your mom always go to your appointments with you? I know it's hard but maybe you could tell her to step outside. Or if you have your doctor's number then you can call them and talk to them about your problem over the phone and tell them that you don't want your mom to find out or something.
Also, the part where you said "I mean we do have intercourse but I do it mainly for his enjoyment" really stood out to me. I don't have a lot of experience with sex but I do know one thing and that is that you should never have sex just to please your partner. It has to be both ways. You don't owe anything to him. You are not his property, you're not obligated to have sex with him. I'm sure you give consent and love him but having sex with him mainly for his enjoyment is not okay. You have the right to say no even you guys are together. I hope you know that. Good luck with everything!  Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
 Blitter2014
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#3
Jun 04, 2014, 10:59 AM
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My doctor has been my doctor since I was little. I'm pretty sure she would discuss it
 so for now I can't do anything. And I do give consent but you're right ... I guess I'll talk with him about it again.Thank you! Sent from my DROID BIONIC using Tapatalk |
| Blitter2014
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#4
Jun 04, 2014, 11:06 AM
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I know that a couple of little blue pills (Xanax, not the OTHER blue pills) an hour or so before things start does help things along a lot for me at least.
__________________
“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi |
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#5
Jun 04, 2014, 11:07 AM
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I'm not an advocate for lying, but sometimes, just sometimes its a neccessary evil...
 Could you tell your dr you are no longer able to achieve orgasm when you masturbate and you worry about the long term effects as you're still very young? Still a sensitive / embarrassing topic, but atleast your mom doesn't have to hear about your sexcapades....
__________________
 DXD BP1, BPD & OCPD  "The best way to make it through with hearts and wrists in tact, is to realise, two out of three aint bad" FOB...
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#6
Jun 04, 2014, 11:12 AM
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Quote:
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Sent from my DROID BIONIC using Tapatalk |
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#7
Jun 04, 2014, 11:20 AM
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Oh, I understand. Maybe you could do some research on medicine that doesn't affect your ability to orgasm and if you're willing to take a risk and change meds then you could tell your doctor that the medicine you're taking now isn't helping and suggest a new one. You can tell them that a friend recommended it or something.
Personally, I wouldn't change my meds if they're helping because I understand that sometimes it's difficult to find the right medicine that will give results. Your health comes first. But it's up to you. Hope you can resolve this! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
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#8
Jun 04, 2014, 11:23 AM
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That's why I'm having so much trouble. I mean I'd much rather keep my sanity and be alive than be able to orgasm but (from what I hear) it would help with stress relief.
Thank you!! Sent from my DROID BIONIC using Tapatalk |
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#9
Jun 04, 2014, 11:32 AM
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 I don't partake in it either, but its what I would've done in your shoes, just seems like a "safer" alternative... I'm thinking just wing it, I doubt the dr will enquire about your technique, ya know?
__________________
DXD BP1, BPD & OCPD "The best way to make it through with hearts and wrists in tact, is to realise, two out of three aint bad" FOB...
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#10
Jun 06, 2014, 05:26 PM
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Well, do you only have vaginal sex? Like... has he ever gave your oral?
If he hasn't gave your oral or a hand job... and if you've never masturbated... then it might not even be the meds. Like... I've never orgasmed from vaginal sex. I'm capable of orgasms, but it just doesn't happen (at least not yet! Never know! I get a lot of anxiety during sex as well and I tend to lose focus). But even without it... I still thoroughly enjoy having sex. It feels good physically and it feels nice to be so close to someone. Some people really only orgasism through clitorral stimulation, which you don't get as much of through sex.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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#11
Jun 06, 2014, 05:47 PM
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I hope he is loving and supportive, and you can work through this together. Please keep in mind your mum might not be happy but most parents are motivated by wanting the best, in the interests of their children. Perhaps sharing with her can help ans she can offer advice. Your m was young ince too. I wish you all the best, but sex should be saved for intamacy b etween married commmitted loving unselfish people.....rather than to satisfy their needs at the cost of yours. uploadfromtaptalk1402094842648.jpg Sent from my GT-I9305 using Tapatalk
__________________
"Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes"  Success and failure are two of many words we get to define, not society. Our success depends on definition and intentions, not actions |
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#12
Jun 07, 2014, 12:15 AM
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I do agree with the commitment part. Because of my anxiety I have trouble making and keeping friends , so when I started talking to him more and he told me he had anxiety problems, we went fishing and relaxed, went to the river a couple times, and eventually he asked me to be his girlfriend. I admit we did begin sleeping together earlier in the relationship than I would have liked, but we both wanted it, and we were committed and best friends and could laugh and talk for hours. Sent from my DROID BIONIC using Tapatalk |
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