[Badjismo]

I have been in marriage for 8 and we haven't had sex since my youngest was born he turning 4 this year. We usually do it twice or thrice a month. I am wondering why she's not asking for it or maybe she is just busy doing her work or taking care or of beautiful kids but it is 4 years almost 5! Next month, we will celebrate our 9th wedding anniversary and I want a new kind of celebration. I want it to be special so I want to take our sex life into the next level.

Any help and advice pls. Thanks in advance

[kaliope]

hi badjismo
the thing that stood out to me in your post is that you stated, she no longer asks for it....the first thing that popped into my mind is that maybe she is wanting you to desire her. maybe after having kids she is feeling insecure and undesirable. why not plan a romantic night out for your anniversary. get someone to watch the kids for the evenign, rent a hotel room and show her clearly just how much you want her. just a suggestion. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

How would she ask for sex? "Excuse me, would you like to have intercourse?" I find that hard to imagine.

In terms of time contraints, there is always time. You can even have sex while watching TV.

Does she have orgasms when you have sex with her?

[Webgoji]

Originally Posted by kaliope

hi badjismo
the thing that stood out to me in your post is that you stated, she no longer asks for it....the first thing that popped into my mind is that maybe she is wanting you to desire her. maybe after having kids she is feeling insecure and undesirable. why not plan a romantic night out for your anniversary. get someone to watch the kids for the evenign, rent a hotel room and show her clearly just how much you want her. just a suggestion. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

I second this ^

Drop some Pepe Le Pew on her. You could cook something special for her, get a special bottle of wine. I love the idea of the hotel room, get one with a hot tub.

Even something as simple as sending her little love letters via text or maybe a handwritten one on her pillow. Put in that little bit of extra effort and you may see it all come back.

[avlady]

Pepe Le Pew how funny!!!