Do females want roughness or tenderness?

From what i gather in the movies, women want niceness during intercourse, but sometimes i see the other side, which is that women want roughness from their men during intercourse. So which is it? Also, am I expected to be rough towards a woman if it isn't my style? Do women want me to be someone that I am not?

Do you expect and want rough penetration from your man at times?

Women have different desires. It varies by person.

I agree with rainyday that it varies by person. For me personally, I like it really rough. But some women like it gentle. And no, you don't have to be someone you're not. If you have a different style from the person you're with, you could try to meet somewhere in the middle, or if not, maybe that person isn't a good match for you.

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Roughness is interesting because I feel it is a demand from the woman to be a certain way, to be kind of an alpha male. What if I'm not an alpha male?

I like everything gentle and like to make love. I think that there is a big difference between making love and sex and I can't imagine roughness as part of anyone's love making, but definitely understand roughness during sex, but again, I'm not into that.

Me, too. BDSM. But I'm in a long term relationship with tons of trust. Oddly, I was vanilla before!

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I think it's more of a "dominate male" than alpha. If that's not your style that's fine. I'd venture to guess most women prefer gentler sex but I'm speculating. Just be yourself. I'm submissive. That's how I am and I just go with that.

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I'll bet they don't want their sexual preferences characterized by a generalization. Just a guess.

You're reading into it too much. People will speak up. I am not judging. Are you?

Real sex doesn't look like sex does in the movies. You should do what feels good to you and what feels good for your partner. It is sensual; you touch with your fingertips, mouths, try different positions. It's like a dance you both do, figuring out what feels good. You communicate with moans, words, pillow talk. It's always different and changing.

My guess is that most want tenderness. But I think that should be talked about before the act. I am a "tender" woman.

Nope, just being a jerk, as usual. I'm still betting that women would prefer that their sexual preferences, especially with regards to the application of violence, real or simulated, would not be characterized by a generalization like "Women prefer roughness" or "Women prefer tenderness". The OP asked us in the title of the thread to choose. Just being Lefty.

I'm unusual. I need the man to be gentle to me, but I need to be rough with them.

Lefty

I like both.

This has been really interesting. Can someone who likes really rough sex explain to me why? I just can't imagine liking it rough... thanks.

Yeah, for the life of me I can't understand why either the man or woman would like it rough. Of course, this is a psych board. We're all just swimming in crazy!

For me, I like it rough because I like to feel controlled (in the bedroom only, and consentualy of course). It feels good to me. I also find it fun.

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I like to be dominated in the bedroom but upon penetration I like a man to be gentle. I suffer from vaginismus to a degree so am tighter most of the time and sex can be painful.

Does that make any sense? I like a man to take the lead and being pinned down is a fantasy but don't like rough penetration? I suppose if you have vaginismus it does although it can get in the way even before penetration. The fear of sex being sore can stop you enjoying what comes before as much.

Personally I would ask the lady you are about to be intimate with what she likes. She will appreciate that. Not all men do that. They don't all pay attention to our needs. I'm sure there are women who don't do that too. It's not a gender thing.

You can't generalise by gender about what someone likes so you have to ask. If not you might do something they don't like and turn them off. It's certainly not nice to be turned off to the point that sex is rough and painful. Or maybe that's just me. I don't know..

I think it is a personal and situational preference. the guy I have been seeing recently likes to be aggressive...not rough exactly...I like it but I also will ask for tender as well, kind of to keep things interesting. I definitely would not put up with painful or violent themed sex. I find that alarming. but again...that is a personal preference...someone else might want that.