[Dylonwarren1993]

Ok so I've been married for 4 years now. My wife very beautiful with an overly healthy sex drive. Her sister very pretty I know she sleeps around. All of my wife's child and adult hood best friends are lesbians. She gets really weird around her sister and her lesbian friends. With her lesbian friends she talks deep and acts tough and with her sister well; she showers with her sister, holds hands with her sister, they kiss each other on the lips, sit on each other's laps ( even when I'm present), they will have sleep overs and sleep in the same bed and cuddle.
One night they thought I was sleeping and I heard them talking about a new show on tv and my wife's sister was so infactuated eith the extraordinary amount of incestiouus acts in it but my wife quickly silenced her knowing how unacceptable it is to be interested in such things. I questioned her about it and asked her flat out " do you have sex with your sister?" She freaked almost broke up with me. She pointed out that I am the one with problems for even thinking that- but all of those red flags I just listed of acts her and her sister do- am I really the one with the problem or is that a logical question based on the facts. But wait Theres more
We are married so what spouse doesn't go through their partners web history- well low and behold incest lesbian porn with very descriptive search titles. I asked her about it
And she got so embarrassed she got angry and tried justifying it. Please help
Me because the way i see it if she is having sexual relations with her sister that is just as bad as cheating or worse. I believe in having one sexual partner in a relationship. I also believe that if she is doing this with her sister what else would she be doing behind my back? Do you think she is a closet lesbian. Seeing as all of her friends are lesbians or guys, and any ex boyfriends she's had she completely despises them for no reason.
I

[Skeezyks]

Hello Dylonwarren1993: I'm sorry I cannot really comment with regard to your wife's sexual orientation. There are other members, here on PC, who are more qualified to do so than I. Hopefully some of them will read your post & reply. However, I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit. My personal opinion, with regard to what you wrote is that. clearly, there is more going on with your wife than she is willing to admit to. I think it is simply going to fall to you to decide how much of this you can accept in your marriage & how you wish to proceed. I wish you well.

[Artchic528]

Originally Posted by Dylonwarren1993

Ok so I've been married for 4 years now. My wife very beautiful with an overly healthy sex drive. Her sister very pretty I know she sleeps around. All of my wife's child and adult hood best friends are lesbians. She gets really weird around her sister and her lesbian friends. With her lesbian friends she talks deep and acts tough and with her sister well; she showers with her sister, holds hands with her sister, they kiss each other on the lips, sit on each other's laps ( even when I'm present), they will have sleep overs and sleep in the same bed and cuddle.
One night they thought I was sleeping and I heard them talking about a new show on tv and my wife's sister was so infactuated eith the extraordinary amount of incestiouus acts in it but my wife quickly silenced her knowing how unacceptable it is to be interested in such things. I questioned her about it and asked her flat out " do you have sex with your sister?" She freaked almost broke up with me. She pointed out that I am the one with problems for even thinking that- but all of those red flags I just listed of acts her and her sister do- am I really the one with the problem or is that a logical question based on the facts. But wait Theres more
We are married so what spouse doesn't go through their partners web history- well low and behold incest lesbian porn with very descriptive search titles. I asked her about it
And she got so embarrassed she got angry and tried justifying it. Please help
Me because the way i see it if she is having sexual relations with her sister that is just as bad as cheating or worse. I believe in having one sexual partner in a relationship. I also believe that if she is doing this with her sister what else would she be doing behind my back? Do you think she is a closet lesbian. Seeing as all of her friends are lesbians or guys, and any ex boyfriends she's had she completely despises them for no reason.
I

I am also a firm believer in one sexual partner in a relationship, especially a marriage. What she is doing is clearly violating the monogamy in this relationship. I would demand she either fess up and stop the behaviors she displays with her sister. I would also look into couples counsling for this, because I can tell you, this type of cozy interaction between them is a bit too "friendly" to be a normal, healthy sibling bond.

[Nammu]

You cannot change another person you can only work on you. If this is bothering you then you need to decide if you are going to stay or leave. Perhaps your wife will consent to couples therapy and you can both discuss these things in a neutral setting without judgement. But to judge her and condemn her actions on assumptions and circumstantial evidence is a recipe for disaster.

[Virneto]

Hello @Dylonwarren1993..

I don't agree with some of the opinions already posted... I don't automatically see a reason to condemn your wife..

You version of thing is totally focused on the "suspicious" behavior of your wife... I mean... If she is with you she must like you, right? how is your relationship?
And, in regards to sisters and brothers bonds... Well, they can be pretty intense and expressed in particular ways.... Some people are bounded to their sisters and brothers in a very intense way... I see it very often that brothers and sisters hang around without clothes and even play with each other in a way that nobody else is allowed...

So, (I'm thinking).. she maybe have had some exploration with her sisters in the past (It happens when people are growing up)...
Do you have brothers and sisters?

I really wouldn't condemn your wife just because she has this special bound with her sisters... If You love her, I would instead try to talk to her and really try to understand this side of her with a mindset of acceptance...
On the other side, if you don't see a point in my way of seeing it, well, don't mind me... Its just an opinion...

I wish you all a wonderfull 2017!!

[Phreak]

1) She's clearly with you for a reason, or she wouldn't have married you.
2) It's a total violation to invade somebodies privacy by searching through their web history etc.
3) This is mostly all in your head, either
• get over it, start trusting her and stop invading her privacy.
• Put it behind you perhaps with the result of counseling
• Get a divorce, one of you definitely deserves better.

[Erebos]

...firstly. LOTS of people do NOT search their partners web history, that's just ....wrong. ALOT of straight women have same sex fantasies. This does NOT make them gay. I kiss my brother on the lips and sit on his knee. I have also shared a tent with him very recently and spooned. I do NOT want to Fk him though! I just feel safe with him, I know he expects nothing from me.We just adore each other, it's that simple. He is my family and if anyone demanded an ultimatum on how I behave with him they would be shown the,door.
You don't get to change other's, only yourself.

[Artchic528]

I don't mean to come across as judgemental, and sorry if I am, but I always viewed kissing someone on the lips as sexual and/or romantic in nature. Same with spooning. Maybe I'm just old fashioned with how I view relationships though. Besides, if the guy feels that it violates the monogamy of the relationship, then he has a right to ask that it be put to a stop.

I will agree that nosing around on her web history is a tad obsessive and unhealthy in nature, no matter what the content may be.

[Erebos]

Perhaps, but surely the sibling relationship was like before he married her? If not then I may adjust my perception, but if she and her sister were always this way then I am sorry but that's just what it is.
I don't see it as sexual unless the intent is there. In my case not so. Regardless,traipsing through someone's private online history is definitely not acceptable. It's something I am afraid gets my back up. So I apologise if I came across abrupt.