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#1
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I think i may have major issues...
i enjoy showing myself off... (naked) to people... but i hate myself... i enjoy being told what to do... and i am involved in BDSM.. i think i have snapped
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“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves” Viktor Frankl
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#2
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I am glad that you were able to speak about the issues that have you confused in your adult life...... I have found that we some times act out sexually as a form of trying to heal from our past thru trauma bonding - connecting with similar events.
If I may ask? - what is it that you are trying to heal from? |
#3
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not an adult life.. a teenage life... and i am healing from the harassment from the whole school
__________________
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves” Viktor Frankl
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#4
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Entangled. I can relate to what you're going through more than you could ever know. I was verbally and physically harassed and attacked by my whole school as well and I have faced the exact same sexual issues you've listed above. In fact, I still struggle with them.
So ok, I NEVER talk about this stuff so I'm going to really put myself out there. I'm hoping I don't regret this but if it helps you, it's worth it. Because I'm still working on these issues I can't be sure but I think it's that I so desperately want approval and attention that this has been a component of my sexual life. I want people to see me, touch me, love me. And that's a powerful need. Those cruel bastards have left me so lonely and needy that every aspect of who I am has been forever altered; and this includes how I relate to people sexually. bdsm and other submissive acts are another form of supplication in a quest to fill that need. Now, I don't believe that all of these things have to be forever bad. It's really up to you and how you feel about them. Being seen, being submissive, and even being tied up can be part of a normal and healthy sex life. But your motive, how it makes you feel about yourself, and who you're doing this stuff with is a big concern. If you're in a healthy, caring relationship these elements can be fine but be cautious because being empty can cause some really bad choices. It has for me. I hope this was helpful. If you want to talk more you can PM me but this, I think, is about all I'm willing to say about my own issues in this thread. Cyran0
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My blog: http://cyran0.psychcentral.net/ Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, PTSD (childhood physical/sexual abuse), history of drug abuse. Meds: Zoloft, Lorazapam, Coffee, Cigarettes "I may climb perhaps to no great heights, but I will climb alone." -Cyrano de Bergerac |
#5
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(((Entangled)))
(((CyranO))) good words CyranO |
#6
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(((((((((((((((((((((((Entangled))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
(((((((((((((((((((((((Cyran0))))))))))))))))))))))))) thinking of you both Linda
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#7
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Well everyone has some sort of issue, and to talk about it is better than just keeping hush hush.
__________________
Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you. |
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