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Old Dec 02, 2008, 05:02 AM
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wayward muse wayward muse is offline
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I can't figure if i'm straight or bi. I find myself mildly attracted to girls, but i don't really want to be with them sexually. Kissing, under the bra, fine, but anything more and i'm not really interested. Not against it either. Still a virgin, me and my boyfriend keep trying to find an opportunity to end that, and we have phone sex regularly, which i like. Am completely attracted to guys, no question there. But would rather see a naked girl than a naked guy. Opinions please.

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Old Dec 02, 2008, 07:07 PM
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theama theama is offline
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You're a teenager, so don't worry too much about that. Most teenagers experiment, and women aren't like men when it comes to the same sex - we can easily be attracted to another woman, and kissing a woman feels damn nice tbh.

But preferring to see a naked woman rather than a naked man sounds a bit odd... but the female body IS aesthetically more beautiful so it's not really that strange lol.
Having the "I wouldn't mind" mentality about other women isn't unusual for straight women either.
I'm straight as helm, but I wouldn't mind making out with another woman (done it many times before lol), I would mind having sex with one though. It wouldn't disgust me, but I'd prefer not to - just out of principle. I tell my bf that I'll have a threesome with him and another woman when he agrees to have a threesome with me and another man. *giggle*

Seriously, I wouldn't even give it a second of thought. Be with whoever you want to be with, your orientation will sort itself out naturally - no reason to scratch your brain over it. You could tell your boyfriend though, most men would be thrilled about the thought of having a threesome or watching two women or anything like that - so it could be a chance for you to experiment and for you all to have some fun. :P
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Old Dec 02, 2008, 07:55 PM
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Rhapsody Rhapsody is offline
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Originally Posted by theama View Post
But preferring to see a naked woman rather than a naked man sounds a bit odd...
I don't think its odd at all... for just like you said - the female body is some thing with in its own right of beauty and sexuality... so why not like looking at it?
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Old Dec 17, 2008, 12:21 AM
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TheDragon TheDragon is offline
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It is not unusual at all for a straight person to feel a bit of lust for their own sex, or for homosexuals to occasionally see the other gender as such. As someone who is a bisexual male, I prefer to look at females (they catch my eye first) but would like sex with either gender just as much. Give yourself time, be open with yourself and others, and do what you feel is comfortable. Time will eventually show you what you like.
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Old Dec 21, 2008, 02:20 AM
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BeaconBright BeaconBright is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wayward muse View Post
I can't figure if i'm straight or bi. I find myself mildly attracted to girls, but i don't really want to be with them sexually. Kissing, under the bra, fine, but anything more and i'm not really interested. Not against it either. Still a virgin, me and my boyfriend keep trying to find an opportunity to end that, and we have phone sex regularly, which i like. Am completely attracted to guys, no question there. But would rather see a naked girl than a naked guy. Opinions please.
An easy and popular answer is that there is a spectrum. No one is completely homosexual or heterosexual but rather there is a spectrum from one end to the other and we all fall somewhere on that line.

The answer that should be given additionally, however, is that we are ourselves, nothing less and no more. There is no reason to define, or label, ourselves. We can be whomever we want to be, and be with whomever we want. As long as you are honest with your partner(s) about what you want and what you are doing, there should be no limits. Be yourself, and the rest will fall into line naturally.
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Old Dec 21, 2008, 07:21 AM
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iamtwilight iamtwilight is offline
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Originally Posted by DragonofPain View Post
It is not unusual at all for a straight person to feel a bit of lust for their own sex, or for homosexuals to occasionally see the other gender as such. As someone who is a bisexual male, I prefer to look at females (they catch my eye first) but would like sex with either gender just as much. Give yourself time, be open with yourself and others, and do what you feel is comfortable. Time will eventually show you what you like.


Wouldn't worry so much about it. It's very common actually, but not so much talked about. A lot of my friends have also reported this, and they have for now decided they are straight.

This is just my opinion/speculation, but to me, your sexual orientation depends on whether you would truly love a person of your own sex, or just someone of the opposite sex, or even a transvestite, or whatever, since there are so many sexual identities and alternative genders these days.

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  #7  
Old Dec 21, 2008, 11:43 AM
DianneIsCool DianneIsCool is offline
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Yup, don't fret over it, like they all said.

Sexuality is made up of many components, including gender identity, the importance of emotional intimacy, the enjoyment level of certain foreplays, ect ect ect. The fact that you can list what you like and don't like is a sign of a growing sexuality that you will eventually become comfortable with, and can label later. Don't let that make you all slutty though, I mean honestly it bothers me how young people are today *lol even though I'm 18* They don't seem to understand that a large part of finding your sexuality has nothing to do with how much time you spend in the bedroom, but rather in exploring in your mind where you eventually want to end up in your life, and what will get you there. It does take a small amount of actually seeing for yourself buuut, you're young, experience will come to you even if you don't go looking for it. I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's kind of like a puzzle full of peices. You're never going to finish it though, nobody does and that's what's beautiful. Even as you grow old your sexuality changes. Start with what you already know about your sexuality, who you are, and go from there, and the appropriate amount of experience will come to you.

The idea that our preference of partners is on a spectrum is rather accurate actually, because although we may enjoy many things about either sex, in the end it depends on where you want to end up. For example, you could enjoy the rigidity of a mans penis, or the curve of a womans hip, or the way she giggles, or the way he is strong and supportive. All these things are merely things you enjoy. The distinction comes in when you consider rather you would be happy with the person the traits belong to.

bi⋅sex⋅u⋅al

–noun
2. sexually responsive to both sexes; ambisexual.


According to the dictionary, you either are or are not, depending what you interpret "sexually responsive" to be. Since you find their bodies attractive, you could either be having an aesthetic reaction or a sexual reaction. That's something only you can answer. Many people arn't so much turned on by women as they find them very pleasing to look at, especially seeing them having sex and enjoying it. It's hard to find the distinction. I would think hard before you use this as a label, and maybe talk to some other bisexuals.

My personal experience is that I enjoy looking at lesbian porn a lot, but that I'm a straight female simply because I would not want to actually BE with a woman. The idea doesn't disgust me, but the absence of desire kind of qued me to understand. You sound very similar to my own case.
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