I have a close friend that I call my adopted Grandma-I call her Grandma everyday! She knows I had planned to go back to school this Fall for another degree & that I would be leaving her; she knows, though, that I won't be too far away & will keep in touch by letters, phone calls, & visits when I come home. However, I recently decided to put off going away for another semester because of my eating disorder & OCD, both of which I'm still in treatment for. I told her that I'm putting off school for another semester, but I can't tell her why. I'm an Activities Assistant & she lives where I work. Even though I put off school a semester, I'm still quitting my job early next month as planned; she knows this. I hope to work part time, volunteer an hour a week, & I will take another Psych. class online (by the way, I want to research eating disorders & OCD. I know I have to be recovered first) this Fall. I'll continue my therapy this year, too, & hopefully I go back to school next Spring.

I visit with my adopted Grandma everyday, give her hugs & kisses & tell her I love her. I've noticed these last few days, she hardly says "I love you, too, " back. She has said it, but not as much as she has before. Instead, she'll say, "You're a sweetheart." I feel like, for some reason, she doesn't love me anymore. I would like to ask her if I've done anything. I certainly don't think I have, but still want to know. My adopted Grandma is so sweet! She's said she's sad I'm leaving & said it again the other day. She knows how much I'll miss her, but will keep in touch. I just wonder if this is because my adopted Grandma knows I'm leaving & she's sad, or if she really doesn't love me anymore.

Thanks for the help. Even you all hate me. Unless I feel better soon, I don't want to be on here anymore.

[Rmdctc]

It can take awhile for people to respond to posts. We all like you, dont take it personaly it just takes people awhile to respond to all these posts.

I would say to be open and honest with her and say how you feel. I would ask her just what you asked here. I know it won't be easy but you will at least know how she feels and where you stand. I wish you good luck with it.

Thank you. I hope to talk to my adopted Grandma about this soon & ask her if I've done anything. If she does tell me again that she's sad I'm leaving, I'll tell her it's okay to be sad, & that I am, too. I will reassure her I will still be her friend & will keep in touch. I remember a few months ago, when I was going to go away this August, she said she was happy for me when I told her. I was hesitant to tell my adopted Grandma because I didn't want her to feel sad a lot, but finally had to say something. She knows when my last day is, & I wonder if it's getting harder on her now. I told her again this Thursday when my last day is, because she asked again about my plans for school.

Even though I'll still be in town the rest of this year, it's going to be very hard for me to leave her, & it will be harder next January when I go 2 hours away. I know I will cry my last day, especially when I tell her bye!
I'm sad now! I'm crying a little, too. She's such a good friend to me & I do anything I can for her, including buying her a birthday present & card-she & I both have July birthdays! I feel like God sent me to her & wants us to be friends; not that I think he doesn't want me to be friends with anyone else, of course-I just feel like she needs me & I'm very protective of her.

Thanks again! I'm sorry I became harsh in my previous reply! I was just feeling emotional, & still am. I shouldn't have taken it out on you all. I'm sorry.

I went to visit my adopted grandma this afternoon (Sat.) again, & during our visit, I asked if I'd done anything to upset her. She said no, & asked why. I told her I was worried & wondering if I had, & she said no again. I gave her another hug & just before I left, I said again "I love you." She said, "You're a sweetheart, dear." I felt like she really hates me. Oh, my.

[jerrymichele]

Ask her why she is not telling that she loves you anymore? Maybe she doesn't know that this is upsetting you. Some people just assume that they know that you know that they love you.

Originally Posted by jerrymichele

Ask her why she is not telling that she loves you anymore? Maybe she doesn't know that this is upsetting you. Some people just assume that they know that you know that they love you.

Thanks! That's a good idea & I plan to do that.

[Fuzzybear]

aww I'm sorry

(and I kinda know the feeling )

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

aww I'm sorry

(and I kinda know the feeling )

Thanks, Fuzzybear. I'm sorry you know how it feels, too. I do know you are definitely loved, though!

[Emotionally Dead]

Hi there.. I am sorry to hear you are feeling this way.. We all feel this way at one time or another, though. I feel the same way with many of my friends, my family, and most of all my ex.. I showed her how much I loved her and she didn't do it back for me...

Just keep in touch with her. Make sure you always show her you care, and love her. I am sure she loves you, the thought that she hasn't been saying she loves you may not have even crossed her mind. Just be patient.

I also would like to say for all of us, and perhaps to make you feel a little more loved, I love you. We all do. Good luck, God Bless.

[quote=Emotionally Dead;1077607]Hi there.. I am sorry to hear you are feeling this way.. We all feel this way at one time or another, though. I feel the same way with many of my friends, my family, and most of all my ex.. I showed her how much I loved her and she didn't do it back for me...

Just keep in touch with her. Make sure you always show her you care, and love her. I am sure she loves you, the thought that she hasn't been saying she loves you may not have even crossed her mind. Just be patient.

I also would like to say for all of us, and perhaps to make you feel a little more loved, I love you. We all do. Good luck, God Bless.[/quote

Thank you for your kind response. I'm sorry you feel the same way. That's so sad. Yes, I do keep in touch with adopted grandma daily. Besides telling her I love her, I tell her I'm here for her, I'll do what I can for her, give her little notes (I gave a birthday present last Thur., which is when my adopted grandma's birthday was ), & of course, I hug & take care of her.

I love you & the others here, too! Thanks again. Please take care.

[Rose3]

it's probably difficult for her to think of you being away,
so keep in touch with her, let her know that you're going to
keep in touch

Yes, Rose3, I agree. She's said before that she will be sad & she knows I already am. I do remind her I'll keep in touch. While I'm still in town, I plan to come visit her say, every Saturday. While I'm away, I plan to write & come visit. I wouldn't feel right about just dropping her. I can't do that.

Thanks!