[UCLAFan]

all my life i have hated how i look.even when i weighed 140 pounds as a teenager.now i weigh 250 and feel even more ugly then ever.i think at times my face is to fat and i think i look pregnant.i was called fat by a lot of family members growing up.when people say nice things to me.i think people are just saying nice things about me because they feel sorry for me.i wish i had better self esttem.but i have no idea how to make myself feel better about myself.

[kaliope]

the key to better self esteem is to do things that make you feel good. I don't care much for my appearance so I just don't look at myself but I don't think I have low self esteem. I am very good at what I do. I enjoy what I do. it makes me feel good so I gain a lot of satisfaction from it. I like to paint. I am good at it. it makes me feel good. this boosts my self esteem. I am a good writer. this gives me something to be proud of. boosts my self esteem. just start finding things that are good about you. what are your strengths. revel in them and you will find your self esteem blooming. take care.

[LaborIntensive]

I feel fat too but I also look fat. All I can do is watch what and how much I eat and go to the gym.

[UCLAFan]

the only things that makes me happy is baseball and music.i know some people that work at a baseball stadium.most of the times they are the only people that are nice to me.i feel like i can be myself around my buddies that work at the stadium.i have cried when baseball season ends and my depression and self esteem gets worse in the winters.i know it's not weather related though.because i use to live in places with good weather.it's because i never see the people i know at the baseball games during the winter.then i feel like they don't really like me.but feel sorry for me because i go to a lot of games alone.i have tried other hobbies and other places to hang out.but some hobbies i tried i did not enjoy at all.places i went to the people where kind of like cliques in high school.plus i got made fun of by people they see me alone at concerts etc.i had people i don't even know call me a loser to my face and then laugh at me

I know how you feel. There are days when I look in the mirror and wonder how I can inflict the hideousness that is me on the world.

If I find the answer I'll let you know.

For me...the key to changing things is to not worry about how you feel about things.... Go to a dietician and get an eating plan to follow... Go to a gym (one that actually has lots of different types of people) and get on a reasonable excerise plan... Then just committ to doing it.... Make checklists... And do all those things no matter what....even if you feel bad about yourself or even if people make fun of you.... If you could committ to doing that for 20 weeks.... I bet you will feel differently about yourself

only you can do this for yourself.

Another hefty gal chimes in!

When people stare or laugh, I think to myself-you don't know who I am. You don't know that I am smart and kind and compassionate. And besides, you could really use some dental work-or did you actually pay for that haircut, or they could use you for the before pictures for nose jobs.

Then I play the Jaws theme in my head and start doing a play by play-I'm going to squash you with my shopping cart! Na-na-na-na. I'm going to kick you in the groin! Na-na-na-na. I'm going to set the petite section on fire! Na-na-na-na!

This is all playing in my head and by this time I am cracking myself up so bad people are wondering why I'm laughing.

Another thing that totally disarms people is to just smile at them so sweetly-90% will smile back. They don't see your flaws-just your beautiful smile and that you made them feel good for a minute.

The standards for beauty change all the time-you can compare yourself to a celebrity-who has endless money for plastic surgery and special treatmets, etc. Or you ca say-I might be overweight or don't like my hair or my mouth or my nose or whatever-but I'm going to look as good as I can when I go out in the world. (And I dress from thrift stores but still pull it off.)

One more thing-I'm no spring chicken, but when I walk into a room, or a store, or where ever-I pull my shoulders back and walk in like I'm the baddest b**** in the place. And when people look at me-they smile!

[Fuzzybear]

[lonelyguy78]

I also feel ugly all the time. Reactions I get from girls only confirm my suspicions.

Losing weight & eating healthier can only fix this to certain point. But when you have a face like mine, its hard to believe being average looking is possible.