[Perna]

They've got a "pamphlet"

http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/publi...troduction.asp

I like the section on how to take care of one's self, 15 "points". Think I'll work on them.

Eat healthy
Exercise
Take time to do what you enjoy
Do something you have been putting off
Do things that use your special talents and abilities
Wear clothes that make you feel good
Give yourself rewards
Spend time with others (who make you feel good)
Create a living space that reflects who you are
Display things you like
Make meals a special time
Learn something new
Do things you know will make you feel better about yourself
Do something nice for someone else
Make a point to treat yourself well every day

Excellent advice, Perna. Especially "Do something you have been putting off. I am the worst procrastinator. Or maybe I should say I am the BEST procrastinator....since I do it so well. ;-)

[salukigirl]

why don't they give those pamphlet's to ad agencies? I know how to make myself feel better. But how is that possible when they make it look like it's normal to be 6 feet tall and weigh 110 lbs? Those are good tips for people who only feel down every now and then but I think most girls under the age of 25 feel more self conscious about themselves than those tips can handle. hence we have new diseases like anorexia and bulemia. Sorry, tanget. Just kinda gets to me when things seem to minimalize suffering like that by saying "do something good for yourself." Especially when a lot of girls (and guys) are to the point of total depression over insecurities from society. Doing something good for yourself doesn't cure depression. Once again, sorry, I went on a rant.

[Perna]

Yes, it is almost criminal what ads do. That's why I think television time should be limited for children. I feel bad for kids nowadays who rarely have a parent or other adult around. It's like being a kid at a parade and not having an adult to lift you up so you can see over the crowds. You just have a bunch of other kids who want to see also and have not so great ideas how to effect that.

[Lyric]

It everywhere, though...Not just television. Billboards, Magazines. It inevitable. And worst yet, it's unreal. Most of those models are either at an unhealthy weight or their pictures get Photoshopped beyond belief. And yet our society covets the unrealistic standards, and makes the rest of us feel like we're ugly.

[Perna]

I don't wear makeup or have many clothes or jewelry, etc. That's not what I'm interested in, so I don't have to fight what the ads are saying. But I don't buy magazines either and my husband can't stand the TV commercials, even though I like to watch to see the "story" but there are so many now and I've lived long enough that I don't have any thoughts or pulls toward thinking if I drink a certain beer that I'll suddenly have friends and be popular or that drinking Captain Morgan will surround me with fun friends and I'll be fun and creative too.

I think most of self esteem is knowing what you really like. If you like chocolate ice cream, someone's ad for vanilla isn't going to sway you or, if it does, then you know you have a problem with being overly dependent on what others think/do. I concentrate on "facts" and use logic to help me not be swayed. The chances of my winning the lottery are almost nil so I'm not going to waste my money. The Maryland lottery has adds that say "let yourself play" which are very tempting, make it sound like I'm not playful (which I am) and that I'm a stick-in-the-mud and there's something wrong with me for not wasting my money :-) I know I am playful, and I also know I'm playful on my terms, not someone trying to fast-talk me out of my money. Getting angry at the ads is a helpful tactic to not being swayed by them but it helps too to know you "are" what they are trying to tell you you aren't. I'm the best Perna there is in existence because I'm the only Perna!

The tips dont really tell you what to do though because like i know i will just look in the mirror and want to cry and then just sit on my floor debating if hurting my self can make me feel better now and so how do those tips come in to play at this momement? Yeah when we are all in a good mood and feeling good thats when we think hey these tips sound great i am going to go do something for me but when we are sad and at a breaking point they are of no help..

thats just my opinion i dont know

[Perna]

"Doing something you enjoy" probably doesn't include sitting on the floor debating if hurting yourself can make you feel better? No one (even the Government) can tell you "what to do" for yourself since everyone is different. But one can't build self-esteem by tearing it down; if looking in a mirror makes you feel like crying, don't look in the mirror. They've done studies and women feel worse after reading women's magazines. Everyone complains about that but they don't stop reading the magazines? There are lots of things one can do to feel better about one's self, depending on what exactly makes one feel bad. But exploring how one feels and why is a good first step to building self esteem because one gets to know one's self better in the process.