New Neighbor

I am trying not to overreact.

A sex offender has moved three houses down.

We do know it was a misdemeanor, child, no penetration.

Whatever. That's enough to have my stomach in knots.

We have twelve children on this street alone.

A sad and scary world for sure.

It's bringing up all kinds of buried, distant feelings.

Yuck.

Petunia

(((((((((((((petunia))))))))))))) i don't know what to even offer here. scary sad.

maybe journal feelings and thoughts and go over them with t?

be safe,

kd

Kimmy,

I never, ever would have thought I would've reacted this way.

I'm fighting off so many images that are trying to push through. I have the "icky noises" blaring in the brain.

That whole feeling of the "cable" went out and all you see, all you hear is the static of the past. You know there's a program running behind it all...I am fighting hard not to plug into it.

What a sucky week this has been...

Petunia

(((((((((((((petunia))))))))))))))

try to keep hands and head busy? i know it's hard...

kd

Rough sleep. Couldn't keep my eyes closed.

Jumped at every little sound.

I feel foolish that I am reacting this way.

Petunia

((((((( Petunia )))))))))

I am so sorry. That is scary. I had one move onto the same block as me when I was at my last house. It scared me too.

Oh, man. I really have nothing to offer, except that I'll be thinking of you and I hope everything turns out alright.

-Jen-

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*TRIGGER~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~





I'm gonna marry you, Mr. Navy man
Have your baby and call him Jack
I like the way you brush my hair
The way your hands rub my back

You know, a man shall leave his mother
A woman leave her home
Your hands tickle my thighs
I squirm as they roam

A house as big as Disney Land
You know we'll have it made
I'm gonna marry you, Mr. Navy man,
As soon as I'm out of the fourth grade.

((((((((((((((((petunia)))))))))))))
w_i

Thanks everyone.

What a trip this has been.

Petunia

((((((((Pet)))))))))

Little children out tonight in bathing suits, running and squealing through sprinklers.

Mothers surrounding the spray.

Mothers standing guard in doorways.

Mothers peering through curtains.

The neighborhood has changed.

(((((((((((((((Petunia)))))))))))))))))

it's not foolish to feel the way you do. it's understandable.

warm thoughts
-shadow

Thanks shadow,

I feel so little...like the boogieman lives on the street.

Last night I had a dream that someone was trying to rip through the screen on the window. I jumped up and listened, and HEARD it.

When I pushed the blind aside and looked it was just a green tree frog...

I know this will pass...I just might have to go through some things first though, ya know?

Petunia

(((((((( Petunia ))))))))))

You can hide with me as long as you like. I'm not going anywhere soon.

Duplicate

Posted in Creative Corner

Trigger~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





LITTLE ONE

I hold the envelope real tight so I don't drop it in the puddles on the way to the mailbox. It is very important business, Flowerchild says, but she lets me carry it anyway. All three of us are putting the letter out today because there's a new neighbor. "We must be careful," Grown Up said. "We must stay close together."

I have to reach up to be able to touch Gail's nose. I pull it hard and her mouth opens right up. I stand the very important business up on the side of her mouth so she can still breathe. Gail-box is very funny. She has no teeth so she won't bite the mailman. He pulls her nose everyday and doesn't even know she has a name.

Flowerchild calls me stupid. "Mailboxes don't have names, or feelings, or teeth," she says.

But she's wrong. Bugs have feelings. Flowers have feelings. Bad men have them too.
I wave to the bad man at the end of the street, as he slips a letter into his mailbox. He smiles and waves back.

FLOWERCHILD

"Great! Now you've done it," I sputter at Little One. I push her arm down fast. Stupid kid. She doesn't even care that the new neighbor's a registered sex offender. Doesn't even care that she is the juicy bait. That she is what he's drooling over.

He won't touch me, no freakin' way. I'll kick him and stab him and stick my cigarette in his eyeball. It's her, the young one, he wants. That's what they all want. Long, straight hair, flat-chested, chubby little legs. What do they see in that? I have everything to offer and I do it real good. Upside down, inside out, on my knees. I know how it's done. I'm a pro.

But I decide who does the touching now and it won't be him. Look at him, the fat old bald man. What would Little One see in him anyway? Fine. If she wants to sit on his filthy lap, let her. I'm fifteen, I'll find plenty of laps of my own.

I flick my cigarette towards him and spit.

GROWN UP

"Hi," I say with way too much enthusiasm and wave. I offer up a half-frozen, polite smile. The new neighbor waves back. I quickly turn away as my stomach flips.

I feel the watching eyes of the neighbors peer from the windows. The doors are locked. The curtains drawn.

We don't know the circumstances, I tell myself. Don't want to jump to conclusions, I tell myself. Who am I to judge, I ask myself.

I go inside. My doors are locked. My curtains are drawn.

My stomach flips.

(((((((( Petunia ))))))))))))

Thanks, Gem,

It's just so awful that so many relate to all this.

Petunia

Petunia--I'm sorry. Maybe that was uncle. If it is, Flowerchild can put out cigarettes in his eyeballs all day if she wants. She can spit on him, she can punch him, she can kill him if she wants. Just keep him AWAY from little ones.
Vicki

i agree with Vicki. ((((((((Petunia))))))))

stay safe, petunia. he can't hurt you anymore.

-shadow

{{{{{{{ VICKI }}}}}}}

{{{{{{{ SHADOW }}}}}}}



Petunia

I'm so sorry!! To my mind, those people need their own special island to live on, not in neighborhoods where they have new victims!! We had one right across the road from us, and I have six grandchildren. Told my husband he had never better even try to walk up this hill !! I wouldn't hurt him,but he would know he wasn't wanted.

You are held safe in our thoughts, Petunia.

With your wonderful name and the wish for safety, I imagine a lush healthy garden of all sorts of flowers and trees and critters. Plenty of sun and shade. Gentle breeze blowing through. Perhaps honeybees to guard the perimeter. A garden refuge, welcoming all us good folks for respite, play, and healing.

Sarah

Thanks for your well-wishes!

It sounds like a wonderful place.

See you there in the thick, rich dirt...

Petunia