[wottesworthgurl]

sorry if I say anything I'm not supposed to but..


I thought the abuse was over for me....it stopped for about 2 weeks..until last night my Mom got mad at me for doing something on accident..and it wasn't even that big of a deal..but she started calling me all types of names and stuff and was yelling at me about blah blah blah...I just kinda ignored it..not really...and she told me to go to my room to go to sleep..so I did...I was pretty upset..and was just trying to focus on getting to sleep but then she comes in and starts hurting me :/...and calling me names and etc.....she usually doesn't hit me with items but this time she did and she wouldn't stop...I feel all weak inside and out and I dunno what I did to deserve that..she told me if I kept crying she would continue to hit me more and I tried to stop and couldn't.she told me that I am grounded forever and that if I ever come out of my room she will kill me <.<...I now have all these bruises from her..not myself..that hurt alot...she told me to forget about my birthday because I'm not important.....and then later that night..when she finally left to go to her room my Dad comes home and I hear her telling him everything all lies and she doesn't even mention anything about her hurting me <.< I'm not the one to hold and grudge and I forgive her...but I dunno what to do she's just making me upset and wanting to kill self but I won't do that..everyone ignores me and it just makes my self esteem that much lower....aah sorry for complaining though..it seems like my problems aren't important enough but oh well.some people are nice but it just turns out that everyone ends up lying to you and I really feel like I can't take it anymore..I'm always getting blamed for things I never do..and she acts like everything is all perfect and like I'm perfectly fine and happy...she tried talking to me today she was making fun of my brother...no I don't really want to talk to her or anyone else

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((wwg))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

if i knew where u lived...he'd be very sorry

[Bill3]

I dunno what I did to deserve that

Nothing. You did not deserve that.

I'm so sorry that she did that to you.

[buttrfli42481]

big ((((((((((((((wwg)))))))))))))
You did nothing to deserve that treatment. Is there anyway you can get out of that house? Call the cops or a trusted adult friend to help you. You do NOT deserve to live in that type of environment, no one does. You are supposed to be safe in your home, and you are definately not safe there. A mother isn't supposed to tell her child that she is going to kill them because of something they did or didn't do. She needs some help. I hope you are able to summon the strength you need to get yourself out of that toxic environment so you can become a healthy person.

[googley]

I'm so sorry this happened. You are not responsible for your mother's behavior! Is there anyone you can ask for help? A friend, or parent of a friend or teacher or minister or call child protective services? You deserve to be safe.

[NuckingFutz]

Thank you for telling us. It is not about you. I want you to look down at my signature line. There is a number there for kids in your situation. There are some people on the other end of that line that are there to HELP YOU. It is confidential what you tell them. We can listen, they can help.

[darkrunner]

I agree with NuckingFutz. You need to call someone who can help you.

Your mother is not supposed to hurt you, she is supposed to love and protect you. But since she is not doing that you have to do it it. That is not fair to you, at all, but there it is.
Her abuse is not about you or anything that you did. It is about her and her issues. She needs help too.
Be strong and keep talking to us, if it helps.

(NF - is your signature line broken? I don't see the phone number you mentioned. Maybe it's just me, I don't know.)

[darkpurplesecrets]

((((wottesworthgurl))))

Thank you for posting and for reaching out. I am so sorry that you are going through this. It is not your fault and you need to reach out to somone to help you. Can you call another adult you trust? A friend's parents you trust? Call someone to listen. There are things that can be done to help you.

I am glad that you reached out here and we are here to listen and support. Just know that it is not your fault that your mom got so angry. I do hear you and understand how you feel. You are worth something and you are worth hearing. Please reach out for help, if you have to call 911. Please keep posting here. Hugs.

dps

[geez]

I'm sorry to hear of your horrible experience. Please get help for yourself.

[foreverhis97]

Awwehh, Im SO Sorry.
& You Didnt Deserve That.
Try And Talk To Your Dad.
Tell Him Everythings Not Ok.
Tell Him What Your Mom Did ?
Sorry If iDidnt Help & Hugs <3

[Sannah]

Gurl, your mom is very sick. I'll bet she attacked you because of something that happened to her that day, her frustration, that she was upset with herself, etc.

I agree with Foreverhis that you might try to talk to your dad to let him know what is going on. You deserve much better treatment than this.

You write how others treat you. You know, how your mother treats you can really decrease your self worth. Our mothers are supposed to treat us well. When a person gets stuck with a sick mother, the message that gets sent to us is "gee, if my mother treats me like I am worthless, I really am worthless". This is the message that gets sent to our child mind but the true and real message is that this mother is sick, sick, sick and her treatment has nothing to do with our real self worth. You have a lot of worth Gurl!! Your mother just has no ability to see it and it isn't because your worth isn't there it is because she is the one with the problem and can't see it.

So back to how others treat you - If you feel like you have no worth (because of how your mother treats you) then you walk around with this belief basically written right on your forehead. Yes, others can see when a person feels that they are worthless. So when a person feels this way about themselves it sort of sets the scene to how the world sees you. Most people then respond to you accordingly.

Please keep us posted as to how you are doing!

[wottesworthgurl]

Thanks for the support guys..