[creynolds222]

Hey everyone. I'm Back and it has been a long time since I have been here and I could use some more encouragement. I haven't posted anything since June of last year. These are my last 2 posts.

06/03/05
I am 24 and in a abusive marriage. It is more verbal and mental then it is physical. It has gotten physical twice. I am trying to leave but have no where to go for a permanent time and no money because my husband won't let me get a job. My 2 kids are not happy at all and I don't want them growing up in this anymore. I have so many self esteem issues and he doesn't do anything to make me feel any better. I could just use some encouraging words and some advice on how to leave without him knowing because he won't let me out of the house as it is. Thanks.

06/11/05
Well...today I have quietly started packing a little at a time. That way my husband doesn't realize what I am doing. My best friend is helping me out trying to find a job in the sly. But it seems that everytime I get an interview, my husband finds out and won't let me go. Things are getting worse. Instead of fighting every 3 days, we fight everyday. I have a year old beagle. My husband punched him and then threw him down the hallway for peeing on the rug. He has been limping for a week now. My mother is going to take him to the vet tomorrow to make sure his leg is not broke because he refuses to pay for it. He threatened to shot me the other day. How can men one day tell you that they love you and the next say such mean things to you? How can anyone hurt another? I have never said such things to my worst enemies.
I just want to thank eveyone who responded. It helps out a lot knowing people are out there to support you. Oh...I am in Virginia for the people who wanted to know.

Well....I left my husband June 19th, 2005. It has been hell ever since. I found out not too long after that I had a heart problem. It took 2 months to get it under control so that I could be medically cleared to go back to work. I moved in with my mom for about a month and then moved in with my best friend. We had made an agreement that I did not have to pay him anything until I found a job. Well, 4 months after moving in I guess that got old for him. He now says that I owe him over 4000 dollars for not paying rent. Needless to say we are not friends anymore. I still haven't been able to find a job. I have sent out over 250 applications and resumes. What the hell is wrong with this world??? On the divorce front that has been hell as well. He got all of the house, all of the possessions, and still has every Wednesday and every other weekend to spend with our son. I had the proof that he beat me and that is why I left and still walked away with nothing. He very rarely pays his child support. And I am fighting with the lawyers to get his vistation decreased because he never wants to take the baby. He is usually too hung over on the weekends to handle him. He is also in a relationship with an 18 year old girl that is still in high school. THIS MAN IS ALMOST 30!! How the hell did I ever get involved with him???? He still threatens me on a regular basis and my lawyer says that they can't do anything about it because they are just words. One of these days he is going to try to kill me and there is nothing i can do about it. Why doesnt the legal system stand up and help out a little???

My mom is a total different story. She hates me!! She says that I %#@&#! up for staying with him and she will never forgive me for that. She treats my son so much different from her other 2 grandkids. She won't even hold him and she barely talks to me anymore. I am strugling and not sure where to go or what to do. My other son, his father has backed out of the picture and quit paying child support. So that little income I do have coming in goes right back out to help my kids eat. Anyone that could give me some ideas on what I can do or the next step I could take would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks to all of those who helped me and gave me the strength to leave. <font color="white"> </font>

[kimmydawn]

((((((((((((((((creynolds)))))))))))))))))

how brave you are. i'm so sorry that things have been so rough. i truly am.

you've gone to community services and stuff for help? also, can you go to the local woman's shelter? they can help you with legal advice, mental health, living, etc. they can be alot of help.

i just want you to know that we're here and listening. you're not alone.

KD

[CJR520]

Both men should be paying child support, and you need to go to a shelter or your county agency to get help. You should be able to get help with housing and food til you get on your feet. You will be o.k.