[avoice]

Been thinking a whole lot lately my kids are asking questions now. What i'm telling them is I don't want a relantship with my family at this time my side. But maybe I do you see I have two sisters that are real sisters but they wanted nothing to do with me about three years ago when something bad went down. They even have my real mother that also baried me. Found out just lately she even has a fb. Not me on it through I just don't understand what I did wrong. Probly just as well what I have is more than what possibly could she have that I would even want. She left me at the age of three to a father that abused me she said it was the judge my father had conections that's a lie . She said she tried to find me that's a lie she said alot of things that a lie. my sisters chose her over me. said i'm the messed up one that a lie there the messed up ones.

[needfixing]

i think your doing the right thing staying away from your sisters.
take this time to heal, get support, and be stress free. (((hugs)))

[avoice]

If I could i would send her a friend request but she has that blocked I would tell her what I think she a whole. thinking horrible thoughts of what I could do.

You might not see this right now, but things can get worse. If you do something stupid, you will most likely go to prison. If not, the guilt will eat you alive, I'm pretty sure about that, don't know though. I've known people who have been in prison. It is nothing to be proud of. They all say that. Some fools make money in there. I think it is a revolving door to them. I, somehow, think that they don't know any better. It is sad. Ask for help. Things can get better, unless you don't let them. It might seem like nobody cares and it isn't fair; that isn't the whole picture. It sounds like you do deserve love and understanding and they aren't providing you with what you need. They have the legal right to do that. It doesn't seem fair, I know, but keep yourself safe. It sounds like you are in the same situation I was in, a long time ago. I needed to take care of myself, because I was all I had. It was survive or survive. There isn't another option. SURVIVE. Sit in hospitals, talk to shrinks and therapists. Be honest, they can tell if your lying anyway. If you lie, they will get suspicious. Things can get better. Endure your situation and accept it. It is what it is. Good luck healing your broken heart, maybe someday you will find someone who will mend it bit. It not fair, it doesn't make sense and it doesn't matter whether it is fair or makes sense. Accept the situation, bandage your wound and trudge on through this messy world we live in. I live in it too. You aren't alone. Peace to you.

[avoice]

I'm not thinking of breaking the law just messing with her mind that's all.

& what would that accomplish? show her that you are just as messed up as you think she is?

really..why waste your time...& sink then down to her level? if she is so bad why would you want to go there?

i have a brother & sister i haven't seen or heard from in over 20 years...i am sure they say & think pretty crappy things about me...i don't give a crap. that is their choice. not mine. i can not change who they are or what they think. one is evil the other severely mentally ill...neither are worth me wasting any time on. i know they would both bad mouth me & say lies...so i have no need to contact them & get upset.

look is it worth lowering yourself to their level?

you can't make people like you...family or not. in time maybe there can be a relationship. tell your kids that due to a disagreement or what ever right now you are not in touch with them but that hopefully later on you will be. but be the adult & act like one & not the child & acting out like a jerk.

[BrokenNBeautiful]

I am sorry your family thinks of you this way.

You don't deserve that.

sorry.

Billi