Doubting Myself

I have all these effects of abuse and I'm pretty sure I was severely abused emotionally but I keep doubting myself mainly because my mom doesn't believe it, and she was there my whole life growing up. She definitely enables my dad (who did the abusing), so maybe she just overlooks all the criticisms and eroding of my confidence my dad did to me. And the couple of times he physically abused me (not so bad though). So I'm doubting myself every day that the abuse caused a lot of my problems. But I have no other way to explain the shame, fear, my lag in emotional maturity, my trouble with relationships, my craving to be abused (which has gone away a lot), my relationship with an emotional manipulator, and a lot of other symptoms that my bipolar can't explain. My mom just doesn't understand how it felt to be abused. But am I right it causes my problems even though I don't have any bruises or injuries, did the emotional abuse still effect me in a lot of ways?

Emotional abuse can be worse than physical abuse and deffinately can impact your life in a negative way.
My mums boyfriend abused me and my sister sexually and my mum is in denial about that . we can't talk about it to her and we feel like we are being " naughty " if we discuss it with each other so mostly we don't . I don't know why are mums don't want to accept the abuse but I understand that it does make us doubt ourselves .

Hugs

Sophie

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You are the only authority on your experience. You don't need your mother or anyone else to validate anything.

Emotional abuse could affect you in every single way. There's no way to turn back the clock and know what would have been different. Life is surely profoundly changed.

I lived in denial of my own abuse for years and that was made very easy because there wasn't a scar I could point to, there was no physical evidence, just emotional problems. I was sexually and physically abused by a very clever psychopath who never left a mark on me. It still twists my stomach when I think about how sneaky he was, it was as if he knew how to obscure reality itself, deny me my own suffering, denied me the ability to see what he did as abuse. If I didn't finally follow my gut, follow my heart, I never would have begun to heal.

It's hard to honor your feelings when you're stuck trying to figure out "Was this abuse? Is that what this was?" I was there for 30 years. Trust your gut and don't worry about what mom says. You have a journey of healing laid out in front of you and unfortunately perhaps she isn't ready to be a support in that journey.

hi paradox,
dont doubt yourself . dont take the blame that your dad abused you and your sister . you deserve much more than that . your mother needs professional help to deal with her denial that it happened to you and your sister. your father needs to ownership for he has done to you and your sister . do you see a counselor about it? if you please tell your counselor about it .if not please tell someone outside of the family and get yourself some professional help too.













Diagnosis: Anxiety and depression
meds: Cymbalta 90mgs at night
Vistrail 2 25 mgs daily for anxiety prn
50 mgs at night for insomnia

It is (verbalabuse) so confusing; it is brainwashing. The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans saved my life and sanity. No one is there to validate your feelings, so you question reality.

I do the same thing. I think about all the hurt I endured emotionally and physically, and then doubt that it was "real" abuse because it is not validated by my dad and my step mother (abuser). It is confusing and extremely scary, because then what the hell is wrong with me if I wasn't really abused but feel or claim that I was! How messed up is that!