[shakespeare47]

It hasn't happened in a while, but every once in a while I get a flashback to a painful memory...

Like the time when I was a teenager and my brother was able to convince others in my youthgroup that I was naive and easy to fool. Others in the group decided to see if he was right, and took delight in telling me one lie after another and then laughing at my responses. One of the leaders, someone I had liked and trusted since I was a child took part as well.

I think those setups remind me of the sexual abuse I suffered at the hands of a stranger when I was a child. I was lied to and fooled and it led to my sleeping in the bed of someone who molested me during the night.

I do tend to blame myself for my response at the youthgroup. Telling myself things like, "you should have been able to laugh it off." At the time it was just too confusing... But I still tell myself, "you should have been able to find a way to handle it."

I still fear that there is something in my personality that makes me susceptible to mind games like these. I fear that maybe I look like an easy target.

Even though those thoughts are painful, I resist the temptation to become like those who tortured me(and it does/did feel like torture some ways). I think they did pay, or will pay for that mentality (let's torture someone for the fun of it). Or perhaps the attitude was, "that guy is blind, let's mess with him." I find it hard to believe that people who have that mentality won't suffer some consequences related to that attitude.

[nicoleflynn]

Please try not to blame yourself for what others have done. Knowing the difference between OUR stuff and THEIR stuff is a big key. People who are cruel and bullying are ignorant and insecure. People who say "you should" are trying to tell you who you are; that is a violation. you were a vulnerable innocent child and taken advantage of; that was never your fault. Everyone is responsible for their own behavior. I am sorry that happened to you. xo

People who torture others emotionally are ABUSERS. They are a menace to society. I hope for your sake they will have to answer for their behavior. All too often ABUSERS and BULLIES get away with it because others fear reporting them to the authorities.

Maybe they deserve to be treated the same way. Seems nothing affect bullies and what infuriates me even more is how they GAIN from their despicable behavior. If only more people would speak up on your behalf, that would help.

[shakespeare47]

Originally Posted by RaisingKay

People who torture others emotionally are ABUSERS. They are a menace to society. I hope for your sake they will have to answer for their behavior. All too often ABUSERS and BULLIES get away with it because others fear reporting them to the authorities.

Maybe they deserve to be treated the same way. Seems nothing affect bullies and what infuriates me even more is how they GAIN from their despicable behavior. If only more people would speak up on your behalf, that would help.

I would challenge the idea that we should bully the bullies, or abuse the abusers (if that is what you are suggesting...) If bullying and/or abusing people is wrong, then it's always wrong.

I would point out that sometimes, there are no authorities to report things to (that was the case in the incident I mentioned in my OP).

[shakespeare47]

But, there was an incident last year, in which I was treated unfairly. I explained the incident to my city councilman, arranged it so I could talk to the president of the board in charge of the abuser (in front of the abuser), told my parents, and some friends and other family, and I went and talked to a lawyer.