Constant little drips

I've heard the analogy that some abuse is like the constant dripping of a leaky faucet. React to it at all, get irritated even a little bit, and they quickly accuse of you of being oversensitive. You're making way too big a deal over one little drop of water. Of course, they're conveniently ignoring the fact that it's only one among thousands and thousands. And I don't know about you, but few things annoy me more than a leaky faucet, literally or figuratively.

Here is an example. A Facebook memory came up for a post I made in 2009. I had noted what a difference ten years makes. In 2000, I was living in my old hometown, was married to a man who is now deceased, was on disability and living in public housing, etc. Now I'm relocated and remarried, not on disability anymore, and living in a house my husband and I own.

My Golden Child brother--the one who always picks apart every slightest little statement that comes out of my mouth--his only comment was, "Actually, the decade still continues until the next New Year." Followed by a condescending winking smiley.

I'm always so stupid to him. I blocked him long ago, but I'm glad for these Facebook memories to pop up now and then reminding me why.

What are some other ways families can abuse by constant little drips?

I guess your brother fancies himself the possessor of razor sharp mental acuity. He must be a ball to be around. Bet he's a real wit.

Actually, a decade can be any sequence of ten consecutive years, which is beside the point.

Congratulations on upgrading your life. Good for you! Inspiring. Things can change.

As or my experience - My brother liked to drop little insults that he'ld insert into a fairly normal conversation. I just ignored them and thought how pathetic on his part. He dropped out of my life. I never felt bad for myself when he'ld do that . . . just sad for him.

My stepfather is notorious for those "drips" that eventually become a lake and you feel like strangling him or something. Yesterday I was visiting my mom and him and we were watching an NFL game and he angrily "shushed" me when the commentators were talking about one of the players posting on Twitter because I was talking over them. I mean, really? It's a football game! The Twitter comment had very little to do with football, but that's beside the point. He really has no respect for me and he still treats me like I'm 6 years old even though I'm 38. He'll also insult me and then say he was kidding when I get upset. I don't know why I even go over there, but I miss my mom when I stay here at my apartment.

Most of my family are experts at the "just kidding" cut downs.

And my mother is queen of trying to pass insults off as loving concern, or even being happy for me. For example, she'll be just a little TOO enthusiastic with the excited jumping up and down when I do something well. I'm talking about everyday life skills here, things most people my age do without a second thought, like get in a car and drive to where they need to go. The undercurrent is that she's surprised I could do it. Point that out, and of course she'll deny feeling that way. But you wouldn't see her jumping up and down because my brother does the same thing.

People who feel the need to pu tothers down are extremely INSECURE.

Sorry to hear about the way your family behaves. It's wrong. And they probably will never change. You improving your life probably rubs them the wrong way. When your family members start with the smart@$$ remarks, you can either ignore it . . . or litterally walk away. If you simy won't stand still and be used for target practice, they might lighten up.

I think I can relate. People who have to pick at you, every chance they get, they aren't happy people. That's a pretty unhealthy way for him to try to feel better about himself. The better you do, the more important it becomes for him to take you down a peg.

This keeps coming up for me today: Keep your head up.

Don't let that dripping faucet of abuse grind you down.