[shiny]

This is hard, I haven't been able to think about this for a long time because I would panic so bad. By the way this is very triggering, please don't read if you are in a bad place.

About a month ago I was walking back home (right now I am living with my sister and her boyfriend) and a guy that I've never seen before approached me. He pushed me down an alley and told me he wanted drugs from me. I don't know who told him what I was on, because I've never seen this guy in my life. He grabbed me and kissed me, shoving his tongue down my throat. He told me I had better get his stuff by the next day or I was in trouble. I ran back home and locked myself in my house for a few days. He obviously has connections because he found out where I live. He broke into my house one day, and I heard him from downstairs so I locked myself in my closet. He went in my basement which is where I had what he was looking for. He took all of it, and I called the cops. They brought two cars, one went after him, and the other one came to my house. It took them an hour to coax me out of my closet because I was so afraid. I don't really remember much of it, but they thought I was having some sort of attack. I really don't remember if I was or not, but most likely I was because I was so terrified. The car that was chasing him obviously never found him because I saw him a few days later. He has friends that are after me now, and I am afraid to leave me house.
This reminded me of my childhood...I don't remember how many times I came home to a drunken father. That always resulted in me being locked in my basement for countless hours...no food, water, no contact except for my dad coming down to beat me. It has taken so much to write these words...I've been overwhelmed with these bad thoughts and memories a lot. I can't seem to get rid of them..

[Kiya]

Shiny, I'm so sorry you went through that -and that it continues. you've been very brave to post here!!!

(((((((((((((( shiny)))))))))))))

Can you do anything further to make you safer? have you notified the police about the other guys? Do you have anyone at all you can stay with?
Kiya

(((((((((shiny)))))))))))

[x_BabyG_x]

Wow, you are so brave for posting this! One thing I have learnt that when awful memories get into your head and wont go away, just write it down. I feel so much better after doing it, it really helps. Get em out of your head and onto paper! Then burn them!

It always makes me free of them, even if only for a short while

take care, babyg xxx