Found (triggers, big triggers)

Just, ****, I, it, can't..be true

no it cant

The door was open when I woke up this morning, and for some reason it's a trigger for the door to be open while I am sleeping

it triggerd a memorey

god I hope it isn't true
it can't be
it stopped when I was 6 didn't it?

after..the..car...accidnet..abuser came and stayed with us, for funeral, because duh it was his mom that died. I rember bieng highly uncomfterable with it, and the fact he was sleeping on the couch
I was sleepign with my door open, in case I needed anything and so my mom could come and check on me, I was really badly injured and medicated, and having severe nightmares and scareaming in my sleep

think going to throw up

because

something happend
while
he
was
staying
here
no
it can't be
it has to be
a lie
no
no
no
no
no

jsut GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ty Kaika

I am..trying to be calm, and work through this, I keep having fitful sleeps, and my dreams haunt me....

I am uncertain wether or not to bring this up with T next thursday, I feel sick and worn down. The memory goes from murky to clear and fades in and out..

I feel sick, and used, and just, all nasty, I want to scream.......

What am I to do with this new information? My brain can't even process it....

(((((Silver)))))) though I am not in a good place myself.

(((Silver)))
Please let your T know...it's important to keep them in the know

Cap

((((sparrow))))

new memories are tough... usually when this kinda stuff happens it tells me i am ready to face it. ugh.

sending you heaps of positive energy, you're in my thoughts.


twilight