New here and scared about biopsy

I am new to this forum and hoping to find some support. I just had a biopsy to check for breast cancer. I was told I have calcifications and they did a stereo tactic biopsy. I should get the results in a couple of days and I am scared. I feel I am dealing with this alone. My children are grown and live on their own, I have a boyfriend that I have been with for a few months, but not too long ago I found out he had a fiance who died of leukemia the beginning of the year, a long story, so this is why I feel alone in this. I cannot turn to him to talk to him or cry or tell of my fears because of what he went through not too long ago. I keep trying to tell myself I went through this 6 yrs ago on the other breast and cancer does not run in the family, but it doesn't help. I just don't want to feel alone with this right now, but I guess I don't have a choice at the moment. Thank you for letting me vent.

Hi Calie17,

I am so sorry you are feeling alone. I am really glad you posted, we are here for you.

Is it possible you might be trying to protect your boyfriend from this or is that he really doesn't want to know what's going on? Are you waiting until you know the the outcome of the test first to talk to him? In caring for you, I'd imagine he'll want to know to be able to be there for you.

I know how hard the waiting is; it leaves us to wonder about all the possibilities and what the worse could be. Do you have things you like to do, some kind of pleasant activities, preferably, or any activities to distract you while you are waiting? Staying busy with activities and more soothing ones is what I do now while waiting on tests and diagnoses because no matter what I think, it won't change the outcome of the test and I cannot do anything about it until I know something concrete. I'll just drive myself up a wall with the possibilities and will have spent a lot of time in fear, sometimes unfounded. Even if it is something to have been worried about, I couldn't have done anything about during that time anyway. The stress isn't worth it. Take extra special care of you right now!

Will be thinking about you. Keep us posted. Sending hugs in the meantime.
-Fresia

Thank you for your support Fresia. What you say is true, trying to keep busy to keep my mind off of things and not being able to change the outcome, I do know that. As for my boyfriend, he does know I had the biopsy, but I feel him pulling away a bit, possibly at least until I know the outcome. As I said, his fiance died, he told me it was a year ago, but it was only four months from the time we met, so it is difficult for him to be here for me. We have spent every day together since we met, and I just got off the phone with him, he's not sure if I'll see him tonight, I should have the results by tomorrow. I don't believe he has grieved the loss of his fiance, so not only am I trying to protect him, I believe he is also protecting himself.

I'm glad he does know and I can understand one one hand, especially with not knowing the biopsy the results puts things in limbo and grieving still in the process. This is also you now and I can see why you feel alone, but he's hanging in there in his own way. I'm here, feel free to PM me. You'll know soon and can take steps from there to do what's right for you and your care.

Sending good wishing for negative results!

((Calie17)) - I know it's human nature to worry but I've learned worrying is a waste of time and energy. I learned this from experience. Several years ago my SIL found a lump in her breast. Even before going to the doctor, she notified the whole family. They kind of dramatic, so everyone was crying as if, she had been told she's going to die. It turned out it was a benign lump. So everyone was put through un-necessary stress.

I'm not saying you shouldn't be concerned because it is scary. I also found a lump and had to have a biopsy as well. I made a point of being concerned, but I wouldn't allow myself or my family to get stressed out. Luckily it came back benign - just a calcification. I learned it was better not to worry until I had the facts. It's okay to worry a little. I pray this biopsy result comes back benign also.

I wanted to update you, I got the results today, and it was benign. I completely understand the point you all were making about unnecessary worry. Believe me I truly am thankful for all of your support and advice. You are all such wonderfully supportive people and I am glad I found this forum.

High five ((Calie)) that's awesome it was benign. I'm happy you didn't have to wait long. Thank God it turned out well for you. Cancer is a scary word, especially breast cancer.

(((Callie))) So happy for you!!!! I went through the same thing as well a few years ago. It's so hard to sit and wait for those results and it feels like nothing can take your mind off the what-ifs...

In my case, I was diagnosed with fibrocystic breast disease, which means I am destined to keep finding lumps so at least now I know what they are and not to panic. But my mom died of breast cancer, so it's hard for me to accept, regardless.

I am SO HAPPY for you and glad that you found your happy ending. Congratulations!!!!!

Feddy

I sure hope you will stick around, good news or not!