[helpmakingchanges]

Hi,
I'm looking for advice and comments about moving forward and making changes in my life and career. First I'll give some background. I moved back to my hometown 3 1/2 years ago. I graduted from a school in Seattle 2008 and had a few contracts in my field. By late 2011 I decided to move back to my hometown. My goal has been to move back to Seattle but recently I've reconsidered that and decided that I first need to make my life better here. I was under the impression that I had to do anything to get back to Seattle. Now I think that's too much of a leap. I'm making incremental changes instead of the big leap I was thinking of making. Here are the difficulties I'm currently dealing with and what I've done so far to get on track. I'm living with my dad and it's an environment that is counter-productive to moving forward. The house is old. When I first moved back it looked like an episode of hoarders. There's plaster falling off the walls. Most everything is grimey. Carpets stained with cat vomit. Water damaged ceiling from water leaking when it rains. There's not proper heating or any air conditioning. During the summer it's very hot and hard to sleep. During the winter it's too cold and I don't like shivering after a shower. Last winter I decided to get two heaters for my room. When I turned both of them on it blew the fuse. My Dad is also difficult to live with. He has issues of his own and one of them that bugs me is that he is very needy. Even people who know him well and are trying to help him have described him at the level of a child. Last time I was in Seattle I was with one of my friends and my dad. We were seeing the sites and I suddenly realized that I needed to take a break from him. He stood in the same place for one hour until me and my friend came back. He depends on people to do things that he should do himself... He doesn't shower. He has a very fragile ego. There's a lot more I could say about my dad and the house but hopefully that illustrates the difficulties of the environment. I'm going to move out but first I need to take care of some debt. I have a massive amount of student loans. It will take a while to pay them off in their entirety but for now I should be able to payoff enough debt in about 8 months to make moving out more feasible. I'm working 2 jobs and donating plasma. I'm in better financial shape and it feels nice being able to pay down debt. Part of my income is used to pay down debt and part is used to make improvements to my current environment to make it more pleasant. I'm going to clean and paint the cupboard that I use to store food in. It's grimy and rusty in places. After paying down debt my plan is to look for an internship in my field with the potential for it to turn into a full time position. I've had people ask why I don't just go and get a job in my field. It's a bit difficult to answer but basically my skills are rusty and I need financial security right now. That's why I've decided to pay down debt first.

Hopefull the information above wasn't too confusing. Now here's the part I'd like advice and comments on. I've done a fair amount of research and I may have Aspbergers. I fit many of the things I've read about Aspbergers. My score on an aspergers test indicated that aspergers was likely. I want to learn how to deal with the difficulties I'm facing in a way that is doable for me. Some other things that come into play are that I am an introvert. I get overwhelmed easily. I have difficulty understanding verbal instructions. Sometimes it feels like I hear the sounds first then the meaning arrives a bit later. Noise in general and certain sounds can drive me crazy. My second job is dishwashing. I wear earplugs but even so the environmental sounds are just too much for me. When I do start looking for an internship I need to be very careful that I find a good environment. While in school and in the conracts I had in Seattle I would often complete a task thinking I had done what was asked but then find out that the supervisor or teacher was upset because I hadn't followed instructions. Improving my skills to get a more suitable job is part of what I need to do but the main anxiety is being in a situation that I don't understand what is required of me.

Also another part of why I decided to post this is to get ideas for resources that would be helpful for me. Perhaps getting in contact with people who have been in a similar situation. Or just getting comments about aspects that I haven't consider would be nice too.

thank you

[kaliope]

hi helpmakingchanges
i think that you are making a good choice in paying down your debt even though you are having to live in unfortunate living conditions. but it also sounds like you are carving out a space for yourself and attempting to make the best in those conditions and that is the best that you can do. if you feel you have aspergers then looking into the state mental health system for free/low cost mental health care to address it is your best course of action. even researching coping techniques to help yourself, talking to people on this site is going to help. thinking about what goals you can set for your future and what steps you can set to reach those goals, like once your debt is paid, how you can get a place of your own would be a good start.

welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

[Ruftin]

Hello and welcome to Psych Central helpmakingchanges!!! It's nice to meet you. You have joined a community of warm and caring members who will want to offer you support and advice. Yours is welcome as well.

Please feel free to contact any community liaison or moderator by left clicking on their name in blue to the left of their post if you need help navigating the forums. It will take some time for your first five posts to appear as they are being evaluated and then you will be able to join chats.

I'm sorry for your struggles. I'm glad to hear you've decided to deal with some of your issues right where you are. Where ever you go they're you'll be and our problems tend to follow us. You'll find we have a safe and supportive community. I'm glad you've joined us.

I look forward to seeing you around!!!

[CANDC]

Hi helpingmakechanges. Welcome to Psych Central (PC). I am sorry you are struggling with feeling you might have Aspergers. Only a psych doc can give you a reliable diagnosis.
You can search the article archive at PC by going to Psych Central - Trusted mental health, depression, bipolar, ADHD & psychology information. and search in upper right corner for example " diagnosing aspergers "

There are many kind and compassionate people here so you are free to feel at home here. Many people here at PC find they can share these feelings and what they are going through with the confidence that people go through similar things and can empathize. So many forums are offered as well as Chatrooms (after you have 5 posts or comments on others posts).

You can also be an active member in other ways like supporting others in their questions, reading articles and posts http://forums.psychcentral.com that are applicable to your area of concern.

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

[matt07]

Hello!

One thing that I find helpful for myself is getting written instructions or writing things down when people tell me things to do so that I remember.

[healingme4me]

Glad you found PC

[helpmakingchanges]

Hi everyone,

Thank you for the comments.