[Woodchuck]

Hi all, new here. Sorry for the long post.

I work overnights (7p-7a or 11p-7a) in a very busy veterinary hospital as a vet tech. The overnight shift is understaffed as it is, and we cross-cover the ER as well. All ER staff leaves at midnight so essentially we have 4 people running the entire hospital overnight. They have at least 12 people during the day.

New management has recently been brought in and they are cracking down on everyone, but especially night shift.

In December, just before Christmas, my hours were cut by 10% (only night shift had hours cut). Per my manager, "it's only 4 hours." Because of this cut, I missed a credit card repayment plan payment and now I am being forced into filing for bankruptcy.

I have been called into the supervisor's office so many times, either for being disciplined for taking sick days when I am legitimately sick (with Drs note), or multiple incidents when the wording of what I write in emails and medical notes is gone through word by word and I am told that the "tone" of my words is inappropriate. My boss made me write her an apology because she was offended by the "tone" of an email I sent relating to one technician who has 12 hours of regularly scheduled overtime built into her schedule (meanwhile night shift is having hours cut). Instead of addressing the issue of the favoritism and the fact that now nobody else can pick up overtime, the meeting became about how I need to tone down my emails and think about how they might be perceived, and I was accused of wanting to take the special snowflake's shifts (which I could not have done even if I wanted to).

I also received feedback that several coworkers anonymously reported that I am "unpleasant" to work with and "relentlessly negative." I have been actively working on trying not to say anything during my shift in order not to offend anyone. My boss said "I sense you're taking this feedback personally." NO KIDDING. You drop this bomb on me and provide no assistance as to how to change, and then you say I shouldn't take it personally???

When asked if she had had any reports that I am behaving better, she will only say "it appears you are trying to do better." The new management brought in was pre-warned about me by this manager and they never got a chance to meet me without being prejudiced against me.

What worries me is that this is a repeating pattern in my work life. My last job was also high-stress and zero-tolerance for absences, and I was fired for requesting a one-week medical leave for depression (not FMLA eligible at that point). I see this pattern repeating again as I dread going to work every night.

Are there any ways of managing depression and anxiety when you have a job that, except for the people you work with on your shift, provides no happiness or satisfaction? I feel like a complete failure on a daily basis and I feel as if management is singling me out as an example in order to eventually fire me. I do qualify for FMLA at this point. I just need coping strategies in order to get out of bed and into work every single day. I am not allowed to take any more sick days for any reason for the next 6 months or I will be fired. The thing is that I consistently receive excellent reviews for my patient care and ethics and I will go to bat for my patients even against doctors who treat me like a nobody.

I don't know. I have had trouble with attendance in every job I've ever had. Absences have mostly been due to anxiety and depression.

Sorry for rambling. I am on the verge of quitting this job without anything lined up, which is a bad life choice, but the nitpicking and the negativity is not letting up despite trying everything I know how to do to meet all of the expectations.

[Mrs. Mania]

I think you should start looking for another job asap. Besides wanting to quit anyways, not missing any days for 6 months is totally impossible with your issues. I also loose every job I get due to chronic absenteeism, I usually last a year and a half. I recently filled out FMLA papers for a intermittent leave of 24 days as needed. Hopefully I'll make it to 2 years this time! Best of luck to you!

[Molinit]

Let me give you some advice from personal experience.

I have had the same issues in the past (except for absenteeism). I have had to become SCRUPULOUS about what I say and how what I say is perceived, verbally and in written form. I have learned to put a smile on my face and act VERY pleasant, even when I don't like the people I'm with or the people I have to communicate to.

I have had to accept that work is not "fair" and while other people's issues continue on, I really don't know if they're being addressed and it's not my job to point out other people's failings, as it only calls into attention MY failings.

I am, to put it politely, a "difficult" person. Very negative. I have been counseled in the past on things I have written and said, my "tone" and so on. So, I really do know what you're experiencing.

You can make 1 of 2 choices here (I have done #1 and have been able to stay at my job for 10 years now):

1. Stay at this job knowing your behavior is being examined for progress with the behavioral issues and attendance. Stop pointing out the unfairness of things or what your co-workers lack. Learn to stop paying attention to it. It can be done. Worry about YOU and what YOU control, which is your behavior and attendance. You shouldn't be losing days due to "depression and anxiety". If you are, you need different treatment. It's not like you're unable to work, so you aren't disabled. If you are seeing a psychiatrist for your medication, make an appointment ASAP, be honest about the trouble at work and why you have needed to be off. Ask for adjustments to your current treatment or different treatment.

If you are not seeing a psychiatrist and/or are not taking medication, GET ON IT. Work closely with your docs so you can improve and get to work every single day. Yes, you CAN go 6 months without being off for depression/anxiety. Get counseling if needed.

2. Second choice is to find a new job BEFORE YOU ARE FIRED OR QUIT. When you get a new job, take the advice in item #1 from day one. Make sure you are medicated and getting therapy from the start so the old problems don't crop up again.

There is a 3rd choice, and that is to declare yourself disabled from your depression and anxiety, if you really feel you can't overcome these items.

I wish you luck, as it's a really difficult problem to have and requires you to grit your teeth and stay quiet A LOT. It's not fair, but it is life.

[sito]

Are you taking any anti anxiety medication? It helps a lot for me

Sent from my SM-N900W8 using Tapatalk

[dolphingirilie]

I have suffered a similar way 6 years ago. I used my FMLA, used my sick and disability insurance to cover it and went to intensive outpatient treatment. I still suffer in the spring months, its a vicious circle. If you can use FMLA it may be a good option, that is why its there. I hope you can find an answer.

[Woodchuck]

Thanks for all the different opinions! I am on meds, which help to some extent but don't entirely treat the depression and anxiety.

I've considered FMLA but can't afford to take unpaid time off. I do not have short term disability insurance. My health insurance has a $4500 deductible before the 30% copay kicks in; I can't afford to see my therapist any more either.

I am looking for new jobs but don't have reliable transportation so that's kind of on hold for now. I guess I just need to find a way to disconnect from work the moment I walk out the door.

[hvert]

I don't know if it will be helpful for you, but for a while my mantra was 'I don't get paid to be unhappy about work when I am not even there.' Whenever I started ruminating about how miserable my job was, I'd try to remember to say that to myself and stop...

[Misssy2]

Originally Posted by Woodchuck

Hi all, new here. Sorry for the long post.

I work overnights (7p-7a or 11p-7a) in a very busy veterinary hospital as a vet tech. The overnight shift is understaffed as it is, and we cross-cover the ER as well. All ER staff leaves at midnight so essentially we have 4 people running the entire hospital overnight. They have at least 12 people during the day.

New management has recently been brought in and they are cracking down on everyone, but especially night shift.

In December, just before Christmas, my hours were cut by 10% (only night shift had hours cut). Per my manager, "it's only 4 hours." Because of this cut, I missed a credit card repayment plan payment and now I am being forced into filing for bankruptcy.

I have been called into the supervisor's office so many times, either for being disciplined for taking sick days when I am legitimately sick (with Drs note), or multiple incidents when the wording of what I write in emails and medical notes is gone through word by word and I am told that the "tone" of my words is inappropriate. My boss made me write her an apology because she was offended by the "tone" of an email I sent relating to one technician who has 12 hours of regularly scheduled overtime built into her schedule (meanwhile night shift is having hours cut). Instead of addressing the issue of the favoritism and the fact that now nobody else can pick up overtime, the meeting became about how I need to tone down my emails and think about how they might be perceived, and I was accused of wanting to take the special snowflake's shifts (which I could not have done even if I wanted to).

I also received feedback that several coworkers anonymously reported that I am "unpleasant" to work with and "relentlessly negative." I have been actively working on trying not to say anything during my shift in order not to offend anyone. My boss said "I sense you're taking this feedback personally." NO KIDDING. You drop this bomb on me and provide no assistance as to how to change, and then you say I shouldn't take it personally???

When asked if she had had any reports that I am behaving better, she will only say "it appears you are trying to do better." The new management brought in was pre-warned about me by this manager and they never got a chance to meet me without being prejudiced against me.

What worries me is that this is a repeating pattern in my work life. My last job was also high-stress and zero-tolerance for absences, and I was fired for requesting a one-week medical leave for depression (not FMLA eligible at that point). I see this pattern repeating again as I dread going to work every night.

Are there any ways of managing depression and anxiety when you have a job that, except for the people you work with on your shift, provides no happiness or satisfaction? I feel like a complete failure on a daily basis and I feel as if management is singling me out as an example in order to eventually fire me. I do qualify for FMLA at this point. I just need coping strategies in order to get out of bed and into work every single day. I am not allowed to take any more sick days for any reason for the next 6 months or I will be fired. The thing is that I consistently receive excellent reviews for my patient care and ethics and I will go to bat for my patients even against doctors who treat me like a nobody.

I don't know. I have had trouble with attendance in every job I've ever had. Absences have mostly been due to anxiety and depression.

Sorry for rambling. I am on the verge of quitting this job without anything lined up, which is a bad life choice, but the nitpicking and the negativity is not letting up despite trying everything I know how to do to meet all of the expectations.

OMG..you are in a TOUGH spot..I was there and fortunetly had FMLA and long term disability available. So I left the job because it was torment.

However, I am not in a good place now...haven't worked in 2 years..the disability I get will be cut off if I don't get approved for Federal Disability. My depression and anxiety are worse than ever....and I guess I'm saying...stick with it...put resume's out there...and try for something where you are a better fit.