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  #1  
Old Aug 08, 2017, 10:28 AM
Anonymous50987
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I had a tough day at work, feeling my bosses don't appreciate me and are mad at me. My direct boss mostly tells me there's no need to take his angers personally. My retail manager can say humiliating sentences such as "Just check X and tell him Y, you're a grown 'lad' you can take care of that". That pissed me off inside and didn't know how to confront this, other than throwing a "Of course I can do this".
I come home to my comfort zone - my room, and my belly is squinted.
What does it mean? I work hard on identifying gut feelings, and it feels like my gut is ruined yet I'm not sure.

I'll further add whenever someone gets angry with me my fingers can mildly shiver with hurt feelings. Today I let their criticisms "improve" me and communicate in an assuring way.
For example, my direct boss assertively yet angrily insisted I clean the storage room "so the other co-worker (who came for an evening shift) can work more comfortably". It felt bad and it makes it difficult for me to concentrate on work, but I pulled myself and told him "Don't worry, I'll take care of everything so you have nothing to worry about", to which he replied "Not a worry at all, I know things get settled eventually", still with his angry tone.
By the end of my shift I asked him "Would you like to see if the storage room is ok?".
He came, he saw, said his "well done" and a tiny note about a cart.
I asked him if there's anything he needs me to sort out, even beyond the storage room, and he dismissed.

Anyway, I'm back home and my stomach is squinting.
What does it mean?
And how did I manage myself with the supervisors? Because with the squinting stomach feeling, I'm not sure I've managed well. They mostly made me feel dumb and unreliable.
Hugs from:
hvert

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  #2  
Old Aug 08, 2017, 04:18 PM
Anonymous50987
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I don't know whether I should have posted this here, or in the Other Mental Health forum.
I seem to come of as arrogant, because I had an attitude of "It's their problem for being so angry, so let's take care of them so I can get a positive response for a change".

I hope someone can help me out in this. This topic makes my stomach crumb/squint/whatever.

I sometimes think I may come off as bossy on my own, though mostly by accident. It's not that I tell them what to do, but I personally see myself as valuable and a person of my own, especially regarding work where I prefer and love to work independently and have equal relations with people, even if they're managers. All those emotions of primarily anger I feel, it's just hard for me.
  #3  
Old Aug 08, 2017, 04:25 PM
Anonymous50987
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I don't think I can work like this anymore. It's really hurting my feelings.
I am sensitive to feelings, yet unfortunately mostly to anger.
I don't think I can deal with all this undeserved hatred
  #4  
Old Aug 09, 2017, 05:25 AM
hvert's Avatar
hvert hvert is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: US
Posts: 4,889
I hope it gets better for you. Dealing with people at work is hard
  #5  
Old Aug 10, 2017, 10:08 AM
Anonymous50987
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Yesterday was better. The boss gave me the shift's goals and shook my hand goodbye, so I felt more respected and appreciated
Thanks for this!
hvert
  #6  
Old Aug 15, 2017, 01:50 AM
GoodVibrations101 GoodVibrations101 is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2017
Location: California
Posts: 79
I am not sure what you mean by "squinting" stomach, but I catch your drift so here are my thoughts...... Bosses will sometimes be straight shooters, and sometimes they will game their employees to achieve the desired result. I have worked for bosses who played favorites, who didn't acknowledge quick and thorough work, who were disorganized and anti-social but didn't acknowledge their own problems. I think bosses realize that if they praise an employee, who is doing a great job, then the employee is likely to ask for a bigger job or a bigger salary or a promotion. The employee is more likely to look around at other job opportunities to earn more money or responsibility. So bosses have an ulterior motive to keep their employees unsure of how good their work is.
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