[LeeSMonrovia]

I got fired yesterday (for the first time in my life). The job was so stressful I ended up depressed/anxiety attacks and had to take a month off work. On my first day back they greeted me with a separation agreement and generous severance. They told me they lost their confidence in my ability to do the job.

I was numb all day yesterday and had trouble sleeping, I can't eat -- no appetite, diarrhea.

I am meeting with my therapist this morning, but I am really struggling with the anxiety I feel around the whole thing. I feel like I messed up my life by not holding it together, but there's no way I could have gone on there.

[blessedlonergrl]

Originally Posted by LeeSMonrovia

I got fired yesterday (for the first time in my life). The job was so stressful I ended up depressed/anxiety attacks and had to take a month off work. On my first day back they greeted me with a separation agreement and generous severance. They told me they lost their confidence in my ability to do the job.

I was numb all day yesterday and had trouble sleeping, I can't eat -- no appetite, diarrhea.

I am meeting with my therapist this morning, but I am really struggling with the anxiety I feel around the whole thing. I feel like I messed up my life by not holding it together, but there's no way I could have gone on there.

I’m so sorry this happened. It sounds very disheartening. I hope your therapist can give you good feedback when you open up about this. It really rattled me when I was fired from my first job. It felt so unfair, as time passed I was able to get get another job. Hugs, I hope you feel better soon.

[seesaw]

I know how difficult that is. I took a month off for medical treatment of my PTSD and depression, and when I came back to work my employer made it so hostile and toxic that I had to resign.

It's nice that they offered you a severance. I wonder if there's some kind of leeway for a wrongful termination lawsuit there though. I mean, they fired you on your first day back from medical treatment? I think that's actually illegal.

I'm sorry you are going through this. It's the worst thing in the world when an employer fires you for having an illness; especially when you took time off to seek treatment for that illness.

Try not to lose too much confidence over it. I know exactly what you're going through though. The same thing happened to me on my last job. I took 10 days of vacation time off to manage a medication change, and when I came back the first thing they did was tell me my position was eliminated and tried to get me to accept $2000 not to sue them. I refused to sign and am in the process of suing them right now because I have proof of discrimination.

Seesaw

[FallDuskTrain]

Do not see this as a failure. It is not. Companies do this often and when perceived realistically, they have the right to expect solid performance from their employees.
I was fired twice, without any severance, because I was not able to make it to work after my dad passed away due to my depression. I wasted a lot of time being angry at myself for not being more resilient, which was a mistake.
I was being too hard on my self. please don’t do what I did.
It seems like they are trying to avoid a lawsuit; otherwise they would not have paid you a generous severance. This is actually irrelevant to your pain, so I am sorry for going off topic. I am glad you have the financial safety otherwise your anxiety would have tripled immediately.
But, please don’t waste your time and energy being angry at yourself or the former employer.
I wish you a peaceful healing process and an empowering recovery.

[ArchieAus]

Industry wants worker bee robots . 'Tis the way it is . It's not your fault ..and sadly not there's . You must maintain belief in yourself . In the right environment you will thrive . We are defined by our work in the current slave trade , but I would urge you to look within yourself and see your worth .
I thought FallDuskTrain said a perfect response . Hope you listen to that .

Originally Posted by LeeSMonrovia

I got fired yesterday (for the first time in my life). The job was so stressful I ended up depressed/anxiety attacks and had to take a month off work. On my first day back they greeted me with a separation agreement and generous severance. They told me they lost their confidence in my ability to do the job.

I was numb all day yesterday and had trouble sleeping, I can't eat -- no appetite, diarrhea.

I am meeting with my therapist this morning, but I am really struggling with the anxiety I feel around the whole thing. I feel like I messed up my life by not holding it together, but there's no way I could have gone on there.

Try to view this as a blessing in disguise. The job was toxic to your well being. The generous severance could be used to travel (take a vacation, or go on a retreat). Now you are free from that horrible job and company, so that you can find out what your true calling is. You'll have to make some practical adjustments to your lifestyle to downsize it, in order to save money during this life transition, but you can do it, as long as you have a good support system of people who encourage you, around you.

Don't panic. That's all I'm trying to say. This is a blessing in disguise. I think being fired can be a real opportunity if you see it as an opportunity to start over, to really spend time pursuing a life and a job that will make you happy. Therapy is good. It will keep you grounded while you go through this transition. I've been there. I know what you're going through.