Starting a new job

I bought noise cancelling headphones... they were not cheap!!! But I got a good pair, I think.

I will join the next happy hour, but I will only have 1 drink so that I don't make a fool of myself. I want to socialize with people and get to know them better.

There are SO many meetings in my new job. Yesterday I had 6 meetings!!!! And, no one is really prepping me for them, so I am going into them rather blind and have to wing it when I am called upon. I don't like winging it, but I also don't want to ask every time there's a meeting what I should. be prepping. But I likely will start asking more.

My boss told me earlier this week that her goal is to hire me on full time in six months, so that was very positive to hear.

I also handed in in-depth holiday keyword research to about 30 people who were in our holiday planning meeting the other day. I felt my spreadsheet looked kind of messy, but my colleague said it was good to send, so I trusted his judgement and sent it out as is. It has lots of comments in the sheet that both he and I had added.

It's harder being a freelancer needing to prove myself every day so that I can be hired in six months. It's a bit stressful, and I suffer from worry enough as it is. I just want to be stellar in my role, stand out and make an impact. I will get there.

I am having to challenge and push back on the external digital agency regarding their work. I found some of their work to be mediocre, at best, and not up to my standards. I also found some of their work to be missing some key elements. I brought this to my boss's attention, and she says it is fine for me to send it back to the agency to redo the work.

I also am finding that the senior strategist at this agency, who is a male, is giving ME some pushback, as well as my more junior male colleague. I am senior to both of them, and have far more years of niche industry experience. I am really sick and tired of dealing with men in my field who cannot respect a woman who has more knowledge and experience than they do. I don't know what it is that I do wrong to not earn their respect and it bothers me.

I mentioned a strategy to my junior colleague that I want to implement. He challenged me by posing a concern regarding this strategy. I did not have the words in the moment, to support it, so a day later, I sent him a detailed email outlining the strategy more, supporting it with evidence and then telling him if he has any other concerns, to please let me know. I also said that I would bring this strategy to our boss for discussion, which I did, and she LOVES my idea. My idea can potentially drive significantly more traffic AND revenue to the website. My junior colleague never replied to my email.

So, I don't know what's really going on here. Do these two males have big egos? And they don't like having a female above them telling them what is what? Or, maybe I rub them the wrong way with my approach.

I have dealt with tons of male sexism in my industry over the years. In one company, I worked with an all male team, and was spoken down to by one of my male colleagues.

UGh. It can really suck being a female in the work environment sometimes. I have to learn a better way to communicate my ideas so that I am inclusive of my male colleagues and don't alienate them, while also showing that I know what I am talking about and gaining their respect.

It's hard.

It’s hard. Team work is hard no matter how you slice it.

I think maybe try to focus your mind on the quality of work and working as a team. Like keep that on the front of your mind: what’s better for the company and how to work as a team. I’d try to not let my mind go too deep into you being senior and superior in your experience and knowledge and them being juniors and less knowledgeable. Even if it’s absolutely the case, if you start focusing on it in your mind in first weeks of work it would add to your stress and will affect your attitude about these people.

I know easier said than done. In my next life I’ll be independently wealthy and will not need to work at all lol Spend our whole lives working like work horses. Isn’t it something.

Good luck with your new venture - you got this.
I am home job searching currently so I know how roller coaster - ish the whole process can be. In my mind at this point I think it is preferable to go thru some uncomfortability at the start than going out and searching again. Best to you ~

LOL. Me too. I would love to. be independently wealthy so I didn't have to work!

Teamwork IS hard. Everyone wants their opinions heard, everyone wants their input to count and everyone wants their to share in decision-making.

I only get an attitude when more junior team members than me feel the need to tell me what's what and override things I say or put forward.

Two more junior males did this to me this week. One in a team meeting, and the other, over email, with several others involved To me they seem full of ego.

I was unemployed from Jan - July this year, so I know your pain. It's hard to be unemployed. Then again, once the warm weather hit, I took myself to the beach a lot and enjoyed some of my time off, despite the stress of it all. You have to give yourself permission to take breaks and to watch over your mental health. Best wishes to you as well, and thank you!

Boy ARE YOU right about taking good breaks. Thanks for the reminder about the beach. I haven't been in too many days. I am in FLa US> where are you?

I’m in the northeast US. Yes breaks are necessary!!!

So, I am proposing a massive site-wide change on the New Balance website that could/will significantly raise both site traffic and revenue from the search engines. It's a massive project. I am pulling together a powerpoint presentation to present my business case for this change to the higher ups that would have a say in the decision.

I am excited AND nervous. It's a massive undertaking, and it would get me hired, if I succeed. And I strongly believe this tactic and change will make a huge difference. Nike, their trop competitor, has this tactic in place on their website, and they own the majority of the market share in the Google search engine. This change I am proposing would give New Balance far greater visibility in Google, and a far larger share of the search market. Right now, their visibility is only at 11%, and Nike is like at 60% or more.

I also had a status update meeting with these two ego-filled men I've mentioned who have been trying to challenge me. I did well and I am proud of myself for it. I did my due diligence research to back up my stance and I presented my data in yesterday's meeting to the group. I think I proved and supported my point effectively because I got the group to support me in wanting more of something that was lacking in their work for the company blog. So, yay for me! I stood my ground, being the most senior member on that team aside from the agency Director who is in charge of the agency's team. He was on yesterday's call listening in.

I had brought the issue to the Director's attention with his more junior team member who had disrespected and disregarded my professional input and opinion on the blog strategy the other day. I met with the the Director 1:1 on Wed and expressed my concerns and stance. I told him that I have 11 years of SEO experience and 5 years of content marketing experience, and was blunt and said that I know what I am talking about. I also requested that if his more junior team member needs to disagree with me, that we take the conversatIon offline for further discussion, and to not disagree with me openly on team calls. That's what I felt was disrespectful. I am, after all, more senior to this team member. He has only 3 years of dedicated SEO experience, yet he carries a Senior SEO Strategist title. I have 8 more years of industry experience than he does. I do view him as far more junior, but I respect his input as well. And that's fine. He will have good insights and great experience to offer, but in the end, I expect him to defer to my judgement, given that 1) I am the client, and the agency should adjust strategy if need be and if I make that request, and 2) I am more senior.

I am not full of ego - it's the opposite. Yet, when dealing with egotistical men in the workplace, and in my particular industry, I have found that it's important for me to stand my ground, support my stance with data and evidence, and to exert my authority as a female leader in a way that shows I have confidence.

And I think I accomplished that very effectively in yesterday's status call with this group. My boss was also on the call.

It’s important to stand your ground but be mindful re complaining about colleagues that early on the job. It hasn’t even been a month. Even if your bosses are receptive, they’ll take a note that you aren’t a team player and complain so early on. I am not saying you are wrong, just be mindful how it looks.

Maybe you could speak to the guy directly how you two could discuss disagreements in the future. Like going off line. Maybe building good rapport with him will pay off.

And even if he and all the rest of them are all inferior to you, he holds a senior strategist position. Even if he sucks and is inexperienced, your bosses apparently value him and his job. I’d be careful bringing up how long he’s been doing something. They might not care about it

Again not saying you are wrong. Just be careful creating a reputation for yourself that you can’t get along with people. You might be better exerting your authority by demonstrating quality of your work, which you have been doing

Well, the difference is that this guy I complained about is in the EXTERNAL AGENCY and NOT within my OWN COMPANY. My company hired THEM, and we PAY THEM for their services. So, I felt it was within my rights to go to this guy's boss and let him know that as the CLIENT, I felt I was treated disrespectfully.

There's a HUGE DIFFERENCE between going to MY BOSS about an INTERNAL COLLEAGUE and going to the agency's boss to let him know that I didn't appreciate the disregard of my professional input and opinion on a client call.

The agency MJUST be mindful of how their employees speak with us on the phone and in client calls and they MUST be respectful of our opinions and input.

I also highly DOUBT that the agency director brought this to my boss's attention. He likely does not want to shed a spotlight on it. And I told him that I did not bring it to my own boss's attention internally.

Oh I see. I thought the guy works for NB and you’d want to be careful if you eventually want to be hired by NB. I am glad to be wrong on all accounts in regards to this situation. I’d not want you to get a bad rep in a new place. Hopefully everyone was receptive to your criticism and will adjust accordingly

Yeah. I would not say a single thing if it were a NB employee!!! That would be a no-no if I want to get hired. So yeah, it was just with the agency, and that’s it.

So, I am sensing that my more junior colleague at NB is in competition with me. He seems to be challenging me on every step I take and on all work I've been handing in. He has carried my role for the last couple of months to bridge the gap while they hired someone (me). I am far more senior than him in my industry. He has maybe 1-2 years of SEO experience. I am thinking that he may have wanted my position and a promotion in the company. I am guessing here, but it is what I am picking up on because he's picking apart my work. Great. Now I have a colleague in competition with me.

Is he making valid suggestions or just totally random complaints?

He’s nitpicking my work.

I can think of at least five ways you could respond. I don't know you, your coworker, your situation, or the company at all, so of course these are all just generic:

1. Thank him for his suggestions/comments, incorporate them into your work product, let the rest of your team know of his contribution, and assign him a little more responsibility -- for example, give him more to "nitpick" for you.

2. If you find some of his suggestions/comments useful and others not so much, treat the more useful ones as in 1. above, and the less useful ones as in 3. below.

3. For any suggestions/comments that you're sure won't work as well as what you'd proposed, thank him as always, then go a little out of your way to explain to him why you think your version is going to work better. He's still free to make suggestions, of course, but you're raising the bar. In order for you to pay serious attention, he's going to have to improve the quality of his criticisms.

4. For any of his suggestions where you recognize that your version could have been better but so could his, thank him as always. Let him know that there's still room for improvement and ask him to suggest yet another version.

If you can't carry out one of the above convincingly then you may in effect be defaulting to this last one:

5. Make it clear to him that he's junior to you, you have more experience than he has, you find his nitpicking annoying, and he needs to stop immediately if not sooner -- or else! As I said, I don't know you or him or the company but I give this strategy about a 5% chance of working out the way you'd like. More likely, he's going to jump to some silly conclusions like that at least one of you might feel insecure; that at least one of you finds the other a threat; that the way to neutralize you and/or keep you at a safe distance is by nitpicking your work every chance he gets; and that at worst, how you react when he succeeds in pushing your buttons is sure to make for some great gossip among him and his friends both inside and outside the company.

@FooZe, thank you for such detailed suggestions! I appreciate this, and the effort you gave.

I have implemented #3 already. I also came up with my own for one of his nitpicky comments, which was to validate his concerns, and then alleviate them by providing supportive documentation to back up my research and approach. He had expressed the concern about using ChatGPT4 for my research.

#5 I wouldn't dare to try. I am a freelancer looking to get hired in five months. I can't cause waves with anyone internally if I want to get hired.

I am going to try maybe one of your other suggestions next time he does this.

But, yeah, it's annoying as heck. It's happened at least 5 times so far, and all in a short period of time.

Is your company supporting your use of ChatGPT4 for research? If yes, you could respond to him that you appreciate his concern and you understand where he’s coming from (many people and companies oppose to or in favor of seriously limiting use of AI for research) but since company doesn’t object it you’ll continue using it.

Also it seems that agency doesn’t care if he’s bugging you. You said you complained about him but here he keeps doing it. So if they don’t do anything about it, you have to figure out how not to let it stress you. Thank him for his concern and tell him you’ll look into it. Then do what you think is right.

If agency or your boss don’t like your work, they’d let you know. Him not liking it is irrelevant. That’s just his individual and subjective opinion.

My boss has not told me I can’t use ChatGPT.

The agency kid I spoke about and complained about is someone different than the NB junior colleague nitpicker. Two males are annoying me. The agency has dealt with their team member swiftly and effectively. The NB male colleague I will not complain about or confront because that’s creating trouble for me and inappropriate. He’s the nitpicker.

Just ignore him if you can. Annoying coworkers cannot be avoided unfortunately. Theres always someone annoying out there. As long as quality of your work is top notch, one colleague’s opinion won’t make it difference. He’s not your boss. He’s entitled to his opinion but it doesn’t really matter in a long run

I'm sick and tired of males in my industry either insulting my experience level and intelligence OR trying to tear me down. I am so tired of it.

I am proposing a MASSIVE sitewide change to the NB website (and ALL other international websites) that will drastically improve their traffic and revenue. It's a HUGE opportunity that I found that they are missing out on simply because they have not had a true SEO expert on the team. The opportunity I discovered is not rocket science and is pretty obvious (to me). It's very basic level SEO that they've missed. The woman prior to me in my role wasn't exactly an SEO guru or expert and somehow missed this opportunity to improve website traffic and revenue. Their biggest competitor, Nike, implements on their website the exact strategy I am proposing for our website.

My proposal is in the works (I am prepping a powerpoint presentation), and higher ups are already catching wind of this through various emails. I have to go through a few rounds of approvals since it's a massive sitewide change that will also impact all international sites.

IF it gets approved and implemented correctly (and I will ensure it is done correctly), I think I will end up getting hired full time. That's my goal. I want to make a positive and very noticeable impact, and I think I've got it in the bag with this strategy.