[Sweet_Boredom]

140 days of sobriety gone. I thought I could try drinking like a 'normal' person. I know that isn't possible, yet I allowed myself to believe it was. I feel so guilty and depressed and detached today. I'm finding it difficult not drinking right now, just to make these feelings go away. I know I can't though. I absolutely cannot allow myself to drink again. I just want to crawl into a hole and die.

[findingmyself1005]

gee i am so sorry that you are feeling so down now, but just becaue you had once slip up dosent mean that you will fail agian..i knwo that i have been told that its almost expected that when in recovery we will have at least one slip up so that was your slip up you know we are only human so try and not beat your self up and i am sure that you will get 141 days next time

Congratulation, Sweet_Boredom for being sober 140 days. Sometimes even the most well-intentioned fall down. Then they get back up and start anew. So, do not be so hard on yourself.

Good luck on your journey to sobriety.

[Pditty]

140 days of sobriety gone. I thought I could try drinking like a 'normal' person. I know that isn't possible, yet I allowed myself to believe it was. I feel so guilty and depressed and detached today. I'm finding it difficult not drinking right now, just to make these feelings go away. I know I can't though. I absolutely cannot allow myself to drink again. I just want to crawl into a hole and die.

Don't Think of It as a 140Days Gone...Look at what was learned during that time...

It took me 24yrs to get 2 1/2 yrs Sobriety.. But I still can remember bits from all my short sober periods and the AA meetings I attended...
We're Not Perfect.....
Good Luck to Ya...

[robert belcastro]

Originally Posted by Sweet_Boredom

140 days of sobriety gone. I thought I could try drinking like a 'normal' person. I know that isn't possible, yet I allowed myself to believe it was. I feel so guilty and depressed and detached today. I'm finding it difficult not drinking right now, just to make these feelings go away. I know I can't though. I absolutely cannot allow myself to drink again. I just want to crawl into a hole and die.

Hello You had a slip, the depression your feeling is quite normal and the same with the guilty feelings, I had the same feelings when I had slips or relapses.. Don't sweat the small stuff, This too shall pass !! wishing you happiness... Bobby

[cocos421]

Hey Sweet,
congrats on the 140 days. That's a big accomplishment. I went 2 years without drinking, with 2 or 3 slip-ups. As of today, I am back drinking, but I have learned how to handle myself. I don't drink as much, like, until the pain goes away, until I feel numb. I know that no matter how much I drink, it's not going to make me feel any happier. So, I just hang out with my husband and down a few, and don't get too crazy. I can manage myself.
Don't be so hard on yourself.You just had a little slip up. You can really overcome this if you really want to. Try talking to someone about your feelings instead of turning to the bottle. I wish you well.

[Raynee1]

I am a Recovering Alcoholic and I know for a fact I can NOT drink like a normal person. I thought I could as well and it really didn't work out. I know exactly how you feel! I felt horrible and guilty and you name it, to dig a hole and hide. That all my hard work was for nothing. But no Alcoholic is perfect we all fall, but it so worth pickin yourself back up and starting all over again. Trust me I was drinking a half gallon of Vodka a day. I've made my mistakes and deep down I never want to go back. Hope this helps I really do know how you feel. It really does get better.

[Sultrysorrow]

I was a hardcore alcoholic for quite awhile. Drinking about 1/3 to 1/2 a bottle of high quality bourbon a night, every night, sometimes more. I was going through a divorce, separation from my daughter and a very stressful job. After awhile I came to realize that I couldn't function during the work day w/o a drink. Then only then I knew I had a problem. So I self referred for help. Quit cold turkey before a three week 8 hour a day period of classes with other addicts. Had to be admitted to the hospital for a week for detox and alcohol withdrawal sickness and was still on benzo's for about a year. Make a long story short, after going through all that I could not tell myself that I would never had a drink ever again. I just enjoyed it too much. It took a while but believe it or not there is more control now with my alcohol intake then I've ever had before. I probably now have about two drinks a week. Do I miss being euphoric and numb all the time? Yes.. Will I ever be in that same situation again drinking myself till I can't stand every night? I cannot say. I just live in the now and recall what I went through to maintain control.

[Pditty]

For Me I CAN NOT Drink or Drug...I know all to well, where the road goes.. It may start with the " I can Handle it now"(********). " A few won't Hurt"(********)...See where I'm going with this. If I was'nt an Alcoholic/addict I would Have know Idea on Controlled Drinking...only A few, Not the Big Drunks Like Before.. I have a Friend in the Program who claims 19yrs sober..(********)...Hell I can bet he's Drinking to get drunk Right Now....

If you want to White Knuckle Your life,Remember your grip will let loose and it's a DEEP Hole to drop into...

I'm pretty strait forward as far as being Clean and Sober.. Hell we all Had Slips..Dust yourself off Get to a meeting, It may be the one that saves your Life...

It took me 24 years of just warming chairs in the Rooms, was never there for me always for the Parents but mostly court...

The day I went for my self was awesome..Still took a bit more digging to hit bottom...

Been clean and sober all day and no plans of drinkling or drugging..That's what we got one Day at A time..

[lkconnelly]

Dude don't be so hard on yourself. 140 days is nothing to shake a stick at. You're only human. Go do something nice for yourself and find a meeting.