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Folder icon Daily addiction check in #1

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  #426  
Old Jul 10, 2017, 04:23 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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(((((junkDNA)))))

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  #427  
Old Jul 10, 2017, 04:42 PM
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junkDNA junkDNA is offline
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I have fought the demon today but tomorrow and the next day are up in the air.
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  #428  
Old Jul 10, 2017, 04:52 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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Good job today! Well done.
  #429  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 07:44 AM
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greentires4me greentires4me is offline
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Daily addiction check in #1
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Love, Light and Happiness!!!
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  #430  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 08:03 AM
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Wow! Congratulations greentires4me!
  #431  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 08:55 AM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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Congratulations greentires4me!!! ☺
  #432  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 09:54 AM
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junkDNA junkDNA is offline
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I haven't used since Sunday. I get paid tomorrow and I'm worried
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  #433  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 10:29 AM
DogLover93 DogLover93 is offline
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I went through two grams of coke and a gram and a half of heroin yesterday. I'm checking myself into inpatient today.
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  #434  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 01:23 PM
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Angelique67 Angelique67 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA View Post
I haven't used since Sunday. I get paid tomorrow and I'm worried
Try to not spend your money on dope. What if Toby/Boby needed a doctor, you'd never call that in if you were broke on dope. ((((sadhug)))) ((((junkDNA))))
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  #435  
Old Jul 12, 2017, 01:30 PM
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distracting myself til 2200hrs, can't buy booze here after that or get a bus for anything other.

to all struggling, hang in there.
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  #436  
Old Jul 13, 2017, 08:43 PM
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im still clean
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  #437  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 12:18 AM
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childofchaos831 childofchaos831 is offline
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37 days... the stupid app on my phone says 888 hours... heh.

im exhausted. im tired of all this crap. im in physical pain constantly, but because im an addict, i get to just be in pain and miserable 24 hrs a day. what's the point of fighting to be clean if life sucks clean as much as it sucks using?
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  #438  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 08:29 AM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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Do you have someone who could help you manage withdrawal or speak with you about what you are going through?
  #439  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 12:24 PM
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childofchaos831 childofchaos831 is offline
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I know a few people, but it's so hard to express how awful I feel irl. Anytime I am with people, the facade is up, I appear normal, etc. But the things in my head are really starting to get to me.
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PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
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  #440  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 01:17 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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No one irl knows how badly you are doing right now.



What about group support like AA, NA, etc.?
  #441  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 03:14 PM
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childofchaos831 childofchaos831 is offline
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I go to meetings. And they can see some of how bad it is, but I can't verbalize it. Saying it outloud is practically impossible.
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Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
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  #442  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 03:39 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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What if you write it out?
  #443  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 03:42 PM
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childofchaos831 childofchaos831 is offline
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I've tried writing it down, I start feeling worse.
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Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
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  #444  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 03:48 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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When you start to express it, by word or in writing, you start to feel worse.
  #445  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 04:11 PM
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childofchaos831 childofchaos831 is offline
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Yep.....
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Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
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  #446  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 05:55 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
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How bad does it get? I ask because I am just wondering whether it might be possible or helpful to get it out anyways, even though painful in the course of doing it.
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childofchaos831
  #447  
Old Jul 15, 2017, 08:59 PM
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(((childofchaos831)))
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  #448  
Old Jul 16, 2017, 01:19 AM
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childofchaos831 childofchaos831 is offline
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It feels like it is too much. Writing it down makes the thoughts worse, and not helpful if I'm trying to notf act on certain thoughts.
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Diagnoses:
PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain
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  #449  
Old Jul 16, 2017, 08:23 AM
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junkDNA junkDNA is offline
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Mornings are hardest for me right now. The urge to get ****ed up. Is so strong. Like that's how I want to start my day. I hate it
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  #450  
Old Jul 16, 2017, 11:11 AM
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splitimage splitimage is offline
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I've been really struggling this weekend with wanting to drink. Not going to, but really want to. It sucks.
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"I danced in the morning when the world was begun. I danced in the moon and the stars and the sun". From my favourite hymn.

"If you see the wonder in a fairy tale, you can take the future even if you fail." Abba

Daily addiction check in #1
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Bill3, notz
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